Thoughts on Hinduism

That is very nice, I am sure people at IndiaMike will appreciate what you are doing. Marriages do work in India, mostly. We take it as a life-long contract, come whatever may, as a responsibility to have children and raise them. Share totally, especially money. I was surprised when I saw an American couple fight over my money, your money. Don't take it for granted that you will be satisfied by your 'ashram experience', many of them are just for money. But I hope your travel in India will tell you new things about life. IndiaMike will be an excellent forum to discuss your plans.

I wont be going near the places that just want money. I have faith that Ill be just where I need to be wherever I end up. The more I read about Haridwar, the more I want to start out there due to I hear its not westernized like a lot of places in Rishikesh but I still really want to go there too.

Rishikesh is not entirely westernized. There are pockets of western ghettos ofcourse, especially around Lakshman Jhula area but its up to you whether you want to join or stay away from them. For me Rishikesh is much better than Haridwar in every way.

Not sure about westernised but all these places are materialised for sure!

Materialised is better than being spaced out.

And money is the easiest and safest thing you can give for something in return.

So, if they don't ask money, be alert, what they want from you. Nothing comes for free and certainly not knowledge.

Wow, so civilized. Does the same financial 'sharing' take place in splits/divorce?

don't make it out to be so idyllic. I've just read some news articles (in Indian papers) about a man throwing acid into his wife's face and then forcing her to drink it and about a couple beating their daughter-in-law because she refused to abort her female fetus. there's a whole different reality out there for many women in India.

I am sure the majority of marriages are good and of course people are decent and kind, but don't make things out so pie in the sky. abuse, whether financial or otherwise, happens in marriages all over the world, not just America!

What exactly do they provide for which they charge? Knowledge ... come on! They jabber a lot and utter blah blah with such confidence that it becomes amusing at times.

Moreover, it is only one way, we shall speak and thou shall listen! At places where they entertain queries, they jumble up the question so badly, that instead of looking for an answer to the question, the person becomes a walking question!

We don't have many splits/divorces. Sure, there are exceptions but the middle class is holding on well as a whole.

Sama has a point.

Replay 1950s England...

-- Hard for women to get divorced because of financial dependency

-- Many do not divorce because of social stigma

-- There are far more divorces, affairs before during and after marriage, than people like to admit.

This public face thing is hardly unique to India. Back in my British childhood, nobody had sex. Not even married couples. So how the hell did we all get born?

Storks ?


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exactly.

it is harder on a woman in a divorce than for a man, even here sometimes. I mean for a woman who is not financially independent, does not have a job, etc.

if there's a chance of a woman and her children being on the street for financial reasons or because of the social stigma of divorce, do you really think she is getting a divorce? no, she will stay with someone she doesn't want to be with anymore so as to have a roof over her and her children's head.

couples don't always stay together because they want to.

Perhaps because Indian couples make extra effort for reconciliation. Even males do not want to break up the family because of children. It is true even for women who are or can be financially independent.

No, sorry, you just described families from all over the world.

This may be myth, but I was told it as true...

A couple, both in their nineties, are appearing in a US divorce court. They have been married for decades. The judge says, "satisfy my curiosity here: you've made this thing work for most of your lives, why divorce now?"

The answer, "We've never been happy, but we thought we'd wait until the children were dead."

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Not myth, not true, very old joke.