Sexual Harrassment

machadinha

I was just referring to you agreeing with something that had been said before.

As for women, I know no such silly creatures of course, so don't listen to me

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sunshinehorizon

It's not that bad...I was warned about Thailand last year. I was told to never venture off alone. Of course I didn't listen. I was fine. I even took a cab at night to the night market in Bangkok.

I would suspect India is somewhat the same. Just don't go off walking alone in the middle of the night completely alone. You should be fine. If people "eve-tease" you during the day, just ignore it. Don't do something you wouldn't do back home.

machadinha

No; I don't have the time or inclination to get into it now, but Thailand (and then notably Bangkok) and India or any of its metros are not the same, no. They're a world apart, rather.

It shouldn't get anyone of either sex scared of either though. There's really no reason to. But they're really very different destinations, yes; and entirely different cultures you'll be looking at. There just isn't any comparison.

It follows that this common idea of I've traveled to place A, so now I'll be ready for place B, is just false (even if just in the wider region, so SE Asia, or anywhere else in the "third world"); and then India will be guaranteed to be like none of them. I kid you not, and I realize it sounds like feeding right into that crappy myth about it; but that is in fact what it is.

Aupmanyav

Luci, which places are you visiting, I hope not Bihar or Uttar Pradesh interiors? You have been cautioned about Goa. I would say ask the hotel where you are staying to arrange for a taxi or a motor rikshaw. Engage a taxi or a motor rikshaw from the street if you are accompanied by another person, especially during night hours.

Matthew Morris

I don't think it's too bad over there, the few horrible experiences I witnessed were spread over 3 trips and about a year in India. So while I don't think it's too bad over there...these things can still happen.

Basically common sense and a smidge of good luck and the majority of people will be fine.

Actually I recently watched the Lonely planet video guide for India (can't remember which one, there are a few)...I couldn't believe the presenter, (a girl) actually suggested a good thing to do was to go off and find a local bar by yourself and go drinking with the local men...that is asking for trouble!

Nick-H

Oh, good grief, how utterly irresponsible!

capt_mahajan

Forget irresponsible. Gimme the lady's phone number

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dillichaat

At the risk of starting a flame war I'll add a voice of dissent about hassle-free travel for women. I've lived in Delhi for just over a year now and both my wife, most of her friends and even some visitors who only were here for a couple of days have been victims of harassment by young males in Delhi.

They were not scantly dressed (not that this should matter), they did not provoke, they did not talk to the guys harassing them before anything happened, they were not drunk. Nothing. They just visited some very well known monuments in Delhi, Nizamuddin's tomb and jama masjid to name 2. Or they took the metro. Or went shopping. All in broad daylight.

Scenarios:

Visit of my wife to Humayun's tomb with a female friend: they were in the monument with another female tourist when 5 young guys came in, touched my wife's buttocks and grabbed the tourist's breast. My wife hit out, the tourist threw her sandal, they started shouting. After a minute a caretaker came with a broom and used this to scare those young thugs away.

Visit of me and my wife to Jama masjid, during the weekend. We walked direction red fort. Many people. A guy just walked up and put his hand between her legs. He hadn't noticed me. I hit him hard. Result: we had to scramble because this guys friends popped up all over the place. The bystanders didn't bother intervening.

A lady whom we know got fondled up and down on the metro by two guys. To their credit, some passengers started shouting at them but that didn't stop them.

I could go on and on....

I have a hard time accepting that somehow these things happen to me, my wife and the people we know in Delhi and not to any other visitor. So please give me a break with the 'it's perfectly safe and in the unlikely event something should happen, everyone will come to the rescue' line.

I get hopping mad whenever I read stuff like this. Not only is it not true, it's dangerous advice.

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Matthew Morris

Actually Delhi was where I saw most of the groping going on.

I've heard of men bothering women on the trains at night while they're asleep also.

girlfromvenus

my 23-day-Tamil Nadu-Kerala-experience, traveling alone:

no sexual harassment at all ! not on the roads, not in the bus or train, not in the auto, not in the hotel...nowhere !

and that's not because I am ugly, hahaha, I even smile at people most of the time.
Some people told me I have kind of a pride-untouchable aura, maybe that's preventing such annoyances (?) but this I would have to test in Delhi

Shivani Skydancer

I lived alone in Delhi for a few months.. a scary incident happened on the second day, but was due to my own naivete, for trusting a respectable looking stranger in uniform who offered to help me carry my luggage in the pre-dawn dark towards ISBT. In the half light the unfamiliar surroundings confused me and I couldn't see where the entrance was. Before I knew what was happening, he lead me to a deserted area behind the buses and started to forcibly grab and grope me. I screamed and wrestled my heavy luggage from him and managed to run to where people were, terrified that he might be chasing after me. That taught me a good lesson.

There were several other "minor" scary incidents involving over-sexed men in India, but this was the most upsetting.

I must say, in my experience, sexual harrassment is a major issue in northern India. Haven't been to the south yet...

capt_mahajan

Agree with Dillichaat's 'dangerous advice.'

The problem with these kinds of threads is this: The topic has been discussed many times before, and many members have given good and sensible advice.

Many do not then- obviously- repeat this advice in every similar thread.


In most kinds of threads this may not matter that much, but with a safety or health related issue it does.

Aupmanyav

Yes, be careful in Delhi, especially in Metro during rush hours. Do not use crowded public buses. Take care of your money and passport. Other places are (West, East, South) are better.

Boston123

Agree.. this sexual harrassment( and the degree) seems unique to Delhi and towns in UP, Bihar.. You rarely have this issue in Mumbai, Chennai, Bangalore, Kerala .With more tourists using public transport, and not staying cocooned in their hotels/ cars, the chances of these encounters has increased.

Me thinks it has to do with the psyche of, and level of interactions between boys and girls, during adolescence in large parts of India, especially Delhi. There is not much healthy interactions(group activities, sports, friendly teasing, dating etc..)between the sexes. Acknowledgement of human sexuality,is even rarer. Combine this with images of the West( Cable TV, the Internet..)that are more easily accessible, and you have a recipe for harassment.

BTW, it is not limited to foreigners, my sister had to deal with this when she travelled by bus to Delhi University, many years ago.

No idea why this is not a issue in Mumbai, Chennai, Kerala etc.. but when I visited/ lived in those areas, I felt boys generally were more comfortable around girls. Some one could perhaps do a sociological study around this?

namaste_cat

Having grown up in Kolkata, Delhi & Mumbai (a few other places too), I've experienced my (un)fair share of sexual harassment (or "eve teasing" as it's euphemistically called in India) over the years the first time being guys calling out to me (a 10 year old at the time) to watch them jerk off right on Marine Drive where I'd be walking to take the train or the bus to school.

To say "eve teasing" doesn't exist in India is to have blinders on. Is it worse than in some other countries? Yes. But it is also better than some other places I've visited e.g. Egypt. As dillichaat and others have outlined, conservative dressing only takes you so far as bad guys will still do what they do. Follow the sensible & practical advice presented here on IM, and you've got as good a chance as possible of emerging unscathed.

For what it's worth, I've not found a difference in South vs North, West, and East. My daughter's also experienced it in Goa, and in parts of the South
But only after dying one's blond hair black/brown, right!? After all, safety first!

Seriously though this takes bad (and dangerous) advice to a whole new level. Good grief, shame on Lonely Planet!