Beware the "friendly" Hello!

edwardseco · Mar 10th, 2008, 00:56

I think my wife has the right approach to jewellry and travel, she has none of it. Even the mangalsutra was fake. When it was chain snatched in Goa we started laughing, 2 USD gone. Now if anyone has any doubts about her being married she would rip their skin off with sharp words. Anyone would recognize a married woman that way..

nadreg · Mar 10th, 2008, 01:02

From Wikipedia:

Taken literally, it means "I bow to you". The word is derived from Sanskrit (namas): to bow, obeisance, reverential salutation, and (te): "to you".

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Namaste

NeeliAankhen · Mar 10th, 2008, 01:02

I think it's very smart to just take costume jewelry on trips, and for me not much of a diminution in any personal tyle statement as it's what I like to wear anyhow -- but -- I would still have a strong reaction to somebody snatching something that belonged to me off of my body!!

Brisso · Apr 7th, 2008, 07:23

I've had that experience too (sort of) - scammer shakes your hand and "locks on" - steering you toward a shop or an alleyway to progress his sales speil.

Lugubert · Apr 8th, 2008, 04:34

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nick-H

Namaste is actually unusual these days. I could rewrite all that complex stuff in the guide books:

What is the way that a Hindu greets a Hindu? Hi!
What is the way that a Hindu greets a Muslim? Hi!
What is the way that a Sikh greets a Hindu? Hi!

All with lots of handshaking.

To a certain extent, yes. But some of the wider smiles I've encountered in India have been when I have adressed Muslims or Sikhs in their own way in a setting where they did'nt expect a foreigner to identify them.

IndiaJim · Apr 8th, 2008, 06:51

I have said 'hello', nameste, and hi to thousands of people in India and without exception it is returned with a broad friendly smile without ulterior motives. If you can't tell a tout instantly you haven't spent enough time there. Most will take a simple 'no' graciously. If you display any interest at all or hesitate you take your chances. You will have to extricate yourself from the situation as best you can.....

sannna · Apr 15th, 2008, 18:28

I think things may be different depending on whether you are a man or a woman. I can only talk from my "female experience", and quite frankly I never shake hands in India with strangers. I will shake hands with collegues, people that are being intrduced to me through people I know, and so, but not with random people.

If I know they're Hindu or if I don't know their religion I do a namaste. If I know they're muslim I say Adaab. With Sikhs it depends.. sometimes I say Sat Sri Akal, but usually Namaste..

I had a little too many experiences of strangers clinging on to my hand, and feeling really uncomfortable. Also it happened quite often that a man would "caress" the inside of my hand with his (middle) finger duringthe handshake. Not only is that an extremely uncomforable feeling, I have also been told that some Indian men get turned on by doing that.. Though I don't know whether that is true. Anyway, enough reaons for me to to stick to Namastes, I think.

Waling/cycling/riding the streets as a white female in India means getting "hello-ed" and "how-are-you'ed" every minute or so. If I would had to reply to all those I would not only feel that I encourage this unwanted attention, but also become really really tired.. So I choose to ignore it often. Only to small children and women I will reply...

shashank.aggarwal · Apr 15th, 2008, 18:54

Quote:

Originally Posted by sannna

Also it happened quite often that a man would "caress" the inside of my hand with his (middle) finger duringthe handshake. Not only is that an extremely uncomforable feeling, I have also been told that some Indian men get turned on by doing that.. Though I don't know whether that is true. Anyway, enough reaons for me to to stick to Namastes, I think.

ummm.... that is a offer for ....in other words its an Indecent proposal...

sannna · Apr 15th, 2008, 19:02

Quote:

Originally Posted by shashank.aggarwal

ummm.... that is a offer for ....in other words its an Indecent proposal...

Thanks for clearing that up. Although I somehow felt it was not okay and indecent I had never heard of it or experienced it before I came to India. Is it an Indian/ South Asian thing, or do perverts in other countries (in Asia or elsewhere) do the same?

shashank.aggarwal · Apr 15th, 2008, 19:09

Quote:

Originally Posted by sannna

Thanks for clearing that up. Although I somehow felt it was not okay and indecent I had never heard of it or experienced it before I came to India. Is it an Indian/ South Asian thing, or do perverts in other countries (in Asia or elsewhere) do the same?

I have no clue about the origins or usage, and I do not even know how I know about it, maybe someone might have told me, but yes, if a man does this to you, it means he is making an 'offer'...

puchoo · Apr 15th, 2008, 19:12

i havent heard about it happening elsewhere either and even in India i think its a bit of a confused signal..as in it happens and is known some places and not in some...not generic i think is the point im trying to make...but either way , yes, can do without it.

sannna · Apr 15th, 2008, 19:15

Okay one more question than (oh how I love this forum with the fast replies!).. is it inappropriate to make a scene/ slap someone if he does the hand thing to you?

puchoo · Apr 15th, 2008, 19:17

not at all..slap the daylights out of him...but there is a problem ( or maybe not) since its not a generic signal there's a small chance that you read it wrong... but even in that case you can always withdraw your hand and inquire firmly , i guess, as to what he was doing...

either which way, it would be strange to do that while holding someone's hand..so ur always in the right!

shashank.aggarwal · Apr 15th, 2008, 19:20

Puchoo...you are accepting it as a Signal and not as a normal handhsake...then let me know what else it can mean in this scenario or any other scenario...

But yes I would agree that one should not get violent in such a case and inquire firmly from the person involved...or maybe create a scene by asking loudly what exactly he meant by that 'signal'..

puchoo · Apr 15th, 2008, 19:21

thats what i said..either way its something funny to do so, depending on the circumstances judge the severity of the revert...

Mar 10th, 2008, 01:02	#17
nadreg Administrator Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: NY, USA Posts: 1,554	From Wikipedia: Taken literally, it means "I bow to you". The word is derived from Sanskrit (namas): to bow, obeisance, reverential salutation, and (te): "to you". http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Namaste __________________ In pursuit of the Only truth: I Am!

Apr 15th, 2008, 19:12	#26
puchoo Maha Guru Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: New Delhi & Himachal Posts: 2,220	i havent heard about it happening elsewhere either and even in India i think its a bit of a confused signal..as in it happens and is known some places and not in some...not generic i think is the point im trying to make...but either way , yes, can do without it. __________________ Cheers! Sidharth puchoo.wordpress.com

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Mar 10th, 2008, 00:56	#16
edwardseco Maha Guru Member Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: Land that shakes and bakes. Posts: 3,445	I think my wife has the right approach to jewellry and travel, she has none of it. Even the mangalsutra was fake. When it was chain snatched in Goa we started laughing, 2 USD gone. Now if anyone has any doubts about her being married she would rip their skin off with sharp words. Anyone would recognize a married woman that way..

Mar 10th, 2008, 01:02	#18
NeeliAankhen Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: New York, NY USA Posts: 268	I think it's very smart to just take costume jewelry on trips, and for me not much of a diminution in any personal tyle statement as it's what I like to wear anyhow -- but -- I would still have a strong reaction to somebody snatching something that belonged to me off of my body!!

Apr 7th, 2008, 07:23	#19
Brisso Specialist muddler Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Brisbane Posts: 367	I've had that experience too (sort of) - scammer shakes your hand and "locks on" - steering you toward a shop or an alleyway to progress his sales speil.

Apr 8th, 2008, 06:51	#21
IndiaJim Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Hobart Tasmania Posts: 11	I have said 'hello', nameste, and hi to thousands of people in India and without exception it is returned with a broad friendly smile without ulterior motives. If you can't tell a tout instantly you haven't spent enough time there. Most will take a simple 'no' graciously. If you display any interest at all or hesitate you take your chances. You will have to extricate yourself from the situation as best you can.....

Apr 15th, 2008, 18:28	#22
sannna Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Amsterdam Posts: 113	I think things may be different depending on whether you are a man or a woman. I can only talk from my "female experience", and quite frankly I never shake hands in India with strangers. I will shake hands with collegues, people that are being intrduced to me through people I know, and so, but not with random people. If I know they're Hindu or if I don't know their religion I do a namaste. If I know they're muslim I say Adaab. With Sikhs it depends.. sometimes I say Sat Sri Akal, but usually Namaste.. I had a little too many experiences of strangers clinging on to my hand, and feeling really uncomfortable. Also it happened quite often that a man would "caress" the inside of my hand with his (middle) finger duringthe handshake. Not only is that an extremely uncomforable feeling, I have also been told that some Indian men get turned on by doing that.. Though I don't know whether that is true. Anyway, enough reaons for me to to stick to Namastes, I think. Waling/cycling/riding the streets as a white female in India means getting "hello-ed" and "how-are-you'ed" every minute or so. If I would had to reply to all those I would not only feel that I encourage this unwanted attention, but also become really really tired.. So I choose to ignore it often. Only to small children and women I will reply...

Apr 15th, 2008, 19:15	#27
sannna Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Amsterdam Posts: 113	Okay one more question than (oh how I love this forum with the fast replies!).. is it inappropriate to make a scene/ slap someone if he does the hand thing to you?

Apr 15th, 2008, 19:17	#28
puchoo Maha Guru Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: New Delhi & Himachal Posts: 2,220	not at all..slap the daylights out of him...but there is a problem ( or maybe not) since its not a generic signal there's a small chance that you read it wrong... but even in that case you can always withdraw your hand and inquire firmly , i guess, as to what he was doing... either which way, it would be strange to do that while holding someone's hand..so ur always in the right!

Apr 15th, 2008, 19:20	#29
shashank.aggarwal Mr. Tagless Join Date: May 2007 Location: ~ Dilli ~ Posts: 4,588	Puchoo...you are accepting it as a Signal and not as a normal handhsake...then let me know what else it can mean in this scenario or any other scenario... But yes I would agree that one should not get violent in such a case and inquire firmly from the person involved...or maybe create a scene by asking loudly what exactly he meant by that 'signal'..

Apr 15th, 2008, 19:21	#30
puchoo Maha Guru Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: New Delhi & Himachal Posts: 2,220	thats what i said..either way its something funny to do so, depending on the circumstances judge the severity of the revert...

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