Beware the "friendly" Hello!

goangoangone · Jan 6th, 2008, 09:10

I was in Margao the other day when a smiling face

called out "Hello, how are you"? He was a guy in his thirites, whom I didn't recognise. I thought maybe he was a waiter who knew me.

He was holding out his hand so I shook hands with him. He then asked whether I was British or Russian. He obviously didn't know me! I thought here we go what does he want?

I tried to release my hand from the handshake but he held on tight. I'm a big fella so I squeezed his hand harder, grabbed his wrist with my other hand and started to pull my hand away. He was trying to slip my ring off!

I just shook my finger at him and walked away. He's lucky I didn't realise what was happening earlier. He would have got a clump round the ear'ole!

capt_mahajan · Jan 6th, 2008, 09:13

Talk about golden handshakes

PeakXV · Jan 6th, 2008, 09:20

That whole 'shaking hands' thing in India is something that can quickly get out of control

- if you let it. Better a 'knuckle bump' or a friendly wave for hygiene sake & apparently, in some jurisdictions, jewellry protection.

julesa · Jan 6th, 2008, 11:26

you should have tried to slip his watch off at the same time and see what he did then

goangoangone · Jan 6th, 2008, 11:48

Lucky he didn't try for the Rolex or the silver bracelet. He would've got more than a squashed hand.

julesa · Jan 6th, 2008, 12:39

i know it's wrong but sometimes when touts would aggressively ask for money from me, i'd ask for some from them. that really confused a couple of them

edwardseco · Jan 6th, 2008, 13:23

Capt.

Quote:

Talk about golden handshakes

You are a card! Good to have some relief in wit..

Khandoma · Jan 6th, 2008, 14:32

I had read the IM thread about scams in Varanasi and massage guys who shook hands western style only to give you a massage you couldn't wriggle out of. So I was cautious when this kid, 7 years old maybe, approached me with an extended hand on the Sernabatim beach in Goa. I replied with a Namaste. He made a disgusted face and left me alone, moving on to the next person. I later found out that he was part of a group who roamed the beach daily, handing papers saying they were from an orphanage and asking for money. Everyday they would come, extend a hand, and make an ugly face at my namaste. Nothing half as bad as what happened to Goangoangone, and that's good because I don't have that kind of physical strength. But to me it sent a clear message, even in Goa where formality is more on the Western side : if you don't want to shake hands, only scammers will get offended.

Nick-H · Jan 6th, 2008, 15:55

Kids love to shake hands and say, "How are you? I am fine!" and we can still say that, at least in this part of India, their approach will be 99% innocent. The same is true for many adults.

In fact, the worse thing that is likely to happen to you on the streets here in Chennai is that that friendly chat will be leading up to a request for money.

I fear that that will change in the not too distant future. Come and get it, while India's relative safety is still here!

Namaste is actually unusual these days. I could rewrite all that complex stuff in the guide books:

What is the way that a Hindu greets a Hindu? Hi!
What is the way that a Hindu greets a Muslim? Hi!
What is the way that a Sikh greets a Hindu? Hi!

All with lots of handshaking. The only Chennai exception I can think of is that many women, especially if they happen to be orthodox brahmin, will be shocked if you grab them by the hand...

uwebowe · Jan 16th, 2008, 15:18

Quote:

Originally Posted by Khandoma

I had read the IM thread about scams in Varanasi and massage guys who shook hands western style only to give you a massage you couldn't wriggle out of. So I was cautious when this kid, 7 years old maybe, approached me with an extended hand on the Sernabatim beach in Goa. I replied with a Namaste. He made a disgusted face and left me alone, moving on to the next person. I later found out that he was part of a group who roamed the beach daily, handing papers saying they were from an orphanage and asking for money. Everyday they would come, extend a hand, and make an ugly face at my namaste. Nothing half as bad as what happened to Goangoangone, and that's good because I don't have that kind of physical strength. But to me it sent a clear message, even in Goa where formality is more on the Western side : if you don't want to shake hands, only scammers will get offended.

pardon my ignorance, but what is a Namaste? tnx!

Ali-Monbeam · Feb 6th, 2008, 01:11

I thought it was hindi for thank you...?

Nick-H · Feb 6th, 2008, 01:35

Traditional Hindu greeting, hands held together in front of chest.

Actually, my wife says it not specifically Hindu, but on this occasion I disagree with her and believe it's origins to be Hindu.

Ali-Monbeam · Feb 6th, 2008, 01:37

being new to this place I am catching up on all the forums and its brilliant what you can learn...thanks

KarmaPhuntsok · Mar 9th, 2008, 22:37

I've found answering 'hello' with a simple and direct 'no' works really well.

the opoponax · Mar 9th, 2008, 22:43

It must be really sad and scary and awful to go to India and be afraid to say hello to anyone.

I said hello to probably hundreds of people a day. 99 out of 100 wanted nothing from me. You'd get the occasional kid who'd follow it with "One rupee?", or the occasional adult whose next words were "Please come in my shop." Both are pretty easy to politely decline. And, again, the vast majority of the greetings were perfectly innocent. Some even resulted in long hours of fascinating conversation. There are a lot of very cool people I never would have met if I'd made a habit of responding to "hello" with "no!"

Jan 6th, 2008, 09:10	#1
goangoangone Monsoon Loon Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Goa Posts: 1,492	Beware the "friendly" Hello! I was in Margao the other day when a smiling face called out "Hello, how are you"? He was a guy in his thirites, whom I didn't recognise. I thought maybe he was a waiter who knew me. He was holding out his hand so I shook hands with him. He then asked whether I was British or Russian. He obviously didn't know me! I thought here we go what does he want? I tried to release my hand from the handshake but he held on tight. I'm a big fella so I squeezed his hand harder, grabbed his wrist with my other hand and started to pull my hand away. He was trying to slip my ring off! I just shook my finger at him and walked away. He's lucky I didn't realise what was happening earlier. He would have got a clump round the ear'ole! __________________ GoanGoan......here

Jan 6th, 2008, 09:13	#2
capt_mahajan (in charge of navel affairs) Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: India Posts: 9,509	Talk about golden handshakes __________________ . Humpty Dumpty was pushed. How do you know when push comes to shove? Indiamike moderating team ..ich bin ein oneliner

Jan 6th, 2008, 09:20	#3
PeakXV Naan.tering Nabob Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Abode of Glooscap Posts: 3,926	That whole 'shaking hands' thing in India is something that can quickly get out of control - if you let it. Better a 'knuckle bump' or a friendly wave for hygiene sake & apparently, in some jurisdictions, jewellry protection. __________________ We shall not cease from exploration and at the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started ...and know the place for the first time. T.S. Eliot Don't go to India ~ Pre-trip Warnings & Misconceptions?

Jan 6th, 2008, 14:32	#8
Khandoma Gourmet Member Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Paris Posts: 304	I had read the IM thread about scams in Varanasi and massage guys who shook hands western style only to give you a massage you couldn't wriggle out of. So I was cautious when this kid, 7 years old maybe, approached me with an extended hand on the Sernabatim beach in Goa. I replied with a Namaste. He made a disgusted face and left me alone, moving on to the next person. I later found out that he was part of a group who roamed the beach daily, handing papers saying they were from an orphanage and asking for money. Everyday they would come, extend a hand, and make an ugly face at my namaste. Nothing half as bad as what happened to Goangoangone, and that's good because I don't have that kind of physical strength. But to me it sent a clear message, even in Goa where formality is more on the Western side : if you don't want to shake hands, only scammers will get offended. __________________ Khandoma Visit my India photo gallery on IndiaMike

Jan 6th, 2008, 15:55	#9
Nick-H Loud-mouthed, Noisy Bird Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Chennai, India Posts: 25,298	Kids love to shake hands and say, "How are you? I am fine!" and we can still say that, at least in this part of India, their approach will be 99% innocent. The same is true for many adults. In fact, the worse thing that is likely to happen to you on the streets here in Chennai is that that friendly chat will be leading up to a request for money. I fear that that will change in the not too distant future. Come and get it, while India's relative safety is still here! Namaste is actually unusual these days. I could rewrite all that complex stuff in the guide books: What is the way that a Hindu greets a Hindu? Hi! What is the way that a Hindu greets a Muslim? Hi! What is the way that a Sikh greets a Hindu? Hi! All with lots of handshaking. The only Chennai exception I can think of is that many women, especially if they happen to be orthodox brahmin, will be shocked if you grab them by the hand... __________________ . Just one member of the IndiaMike Mod Team

Jan 6th, 2008, 11:26	#4
julesa Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: melbourne australia Posts: 291	you should have tried to slip his watch off at the same time and see what he did then

Jan 6th, 2008, 11:48	#5
goangoangone Monsoon Loon Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Goa Posts: 1,492	Lucky he didn't try for the Rolex or the silver bracelet. He would've got more than a squashed hand.

Jan 6th, 2008, 12:39	#6
julesa Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: melbourne australia Posts: 291	i know it's wrong but sometimes when touts would aggressively ask for money from me, i'd ask for some from them. that really confused a couple of them

Feb 6th, 2008, 01:11	#11
Ali-Monbeam Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Bradford Posts: 375	I thought it was hindi for thank you...?

Feb 6th, 2008, 01:35	#12
Nick-H Loud-mouthed, Noisy Bird Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Chennai, India Posts: 25,298	Traditional Hindu greeting, hands held together in front of chest. Actually, my wife says it not specifically Hindu, but on this occasion I disagree with her and believe it's origins to be Hindu.

Feb 6th, 2008, 01:37	#13
Ali-Monbeam Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Bradford Posts: 375	being new to this place I am catching up on all the forums and its brilliant what you can learn...thanks

Mar 9th, 2008, 22:37	#14
KarmaPhuntsok Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: London, UK Posts: 24	I've found answering 'hello' with a simple and direct 'no' works really well.

Mar 9th, 2008, 22:43	#15
the opoponax Maha Guru Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Brooklyn, via New Orleans Posts: 1,054	It must be really sad and scary and awful to go to India and be afraid to say hello to anyone. I said hello to probably hundreds of people a day. 99 out of 100 wanted nothing from me. You'd get the occasional kid who'd follow it with "One rupee?", or the occasional adult whose next words were "Please come in my shop." Both are pretty easy to politely decline. And, again, the vast majority of the greetings were perfectly innocent. Some even resulted in long hours of fascinating conversation. There are a lot of very cool people I never would have met if I'd made a habit of responding to "hello" with "no!"

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