Single guy potentially moving to Mumbai - lots of personal questions!

Laanisa, dating opportunities for men and women are not the same. A foreign woman will have no problem dating Indian men. On the other hand, a man, Indian or foreign, may find it tough to find a suitable date. Things are more difficult for an Indian man to find an India date, too many cultural issues. Perhaps, men and women date freely in high end Indian social strata. Laanis, your perspecitive does not reflect the reality.

Women do not enjoy the same cultural freedom that men do, not yet anyway. Divorced women have tough time finding a suitable match!
Honor killing of young females by parents/family is not out the question when a female dates a man without their consent or gets pregnant out of the wedlock.

It will take a very long long time before Indian females can socialize and date like girls in American schools and colleges.

A sizable percentage of the Indian women that a single expat would engage with socially in Mumbai would be open to dating a non-Indian. The sizable percentage of expats (male AND female) who end up dating and/or marrying locals here in the city confirms this. What may or may not be true of Indian culture as a whole doesn't really apply to somebody in the same circumstances as the OP.

I agree for sure that it's different for men and women here, also in Mumbai. But what i was trying to say is that it's far from impossible for a nice foreign man to find true love here..I would say it might even be easier at a later age as you have matured and got to know the reality of a relationship and of marriage..

I know personally three couples that have divorced in the last couple of years,they are all in their late thirties to forties, I know many succesful and open minded people who don't mind their daughters dating a foreigner. Most of my friends here have had sex before marriage, some have been living together a couple of years as a couple with their parents consent.
I do know this is not the norm,also that it definitely would be a bit more difficult here to date and you should move to India knowing this, but just wanted to share a different kind of view to the general opinion that no girl would ever date a foreigner

Laanisa, you have given a well balaced response. There are exceptions as you indicated, however, in general, it will take a very long long time before Indians accept dating and the type of social and sexual freedom enjoyed by females here in America.

Interesting thread. The one question not answered is "where to meet other singles?" I have been in Mumbai now for nearly three months. I can say that I have not even come close to meeting anyone. After living in other cities such as Istanbul, Salzburg and Rio, the social life adjustment in India has been much greater than expected. On weekends, i try to frequent the restaurants in Powai. Its a great area but mostly families and couples from what I have seen so far. Interesting discussion.

My question is : did you move or not?

Designer - yes, I moved. And it's been a great experience so far. So much so, this is the first time I've logged on here in ages!

A few perspectives having taken the plunge.

I find that meeting Indian women is TOUGH. There appears to be this thing cultural where it is frowned upon if they are seen talking to a guy who is not family - as if they are ruining their reputation or something. Some (well-meaning) relative or friend will interrupt any polite attempt at conversation.

Having said that, it does appear to be stratified, where certain 'levels' (I hate using that term, but it appears to be the case in Mumbai) of society have different attitudes to dating.

Meeting ex-pat women is easier, although the ex-pat community is tiny here compared to other major cities worldwide.

As for a 'place to meet singles' - I still haven't found an obvious one! I live in Bandra, which is great, but it's not like there are obvious places for singles to hang out (for the reasons mentioned above). Meeting people just happens through getting out and about, joining clubs/events/etc. and gradually a whole social circle emerges (like anywhere else in the world).

All-in-all it's a challenge, but not an insurmountable one, for a single guy. Definitely different than home, but then I expected that. Many of my concerns were well-founded, and a lot of the early replies on this thread identified issues that have arisen. But, I'm glad I made the move, and if anyone was considering this in a similar position, I would say 'go for it' - just get yourself into the mix of Mumbai life and all will be great!

clarasuncle

Get a family to "adopt" you. You can ask one of the girls in the family to tie a rakhi around your wrist: that makes you her "brother". Then you can make conversation with her friends without any relative interrupting.

In this modern times

Most people in India live in three different centuries at the same time.

Being addressed as "Brother."

The Indian equivalent of Let's just be friends. All romantic notions dashed.

really,
you are not networking with the right people.
Funny, Being frowned upon and interrupted by family
Are you talking about the same Bandra that I know of

Really interesting thread, I have recently moved here I am a single female from the UK.....I'm not so keen on these 200 people group outings as it can be a bit like a speed networking event! Be keen to know if there is a group of single expat professionals here.....I'm not looking for a partner as such but agree it can be difficult to strike the same rapport with those who are here with a family....

Hi,

I am pretty much in the same boat as you. Have you found anywhere decent to go at the weekends ?

Not massive fan on rocking up as a one man band trying to befriend people

It helps if you get to know other expats through groups like http://groups.yahoo.com/group/bombayexpats/ etc. There is always a figurehead/organizer at the center of such groups. They should be able to put you in touch with other single expats in their circle. Buying them dinner is usually the quickest way to get it done..