More random observations on mumbai...

boredinmumbai

I had mentioned before that Mumbai exists at two levels but then I was talking about money. I have the same observation again but this time I'm not talking about money at all. Give up? I'm referring to whether you are with a woman or not. No big secret but in case you are an unaccompanied guy (or worse, a bunch of unaccompanied guys known as "stags" in local parlance), you will be denied entry at all happening night spots in the city. Some might let you in but you will paying a ridiculous cover of Rs. 1500-2500 that may or may not be comp'ed for overpriced drinks but I digress... Last week, I had the pleasure of my SO being in town and it was like a completely new universe just opened up. It's like all of a sudden, I'm rid of some plague that I was carrying when I was by myself and now I'm "most welcome" in any spot I choose to visit. Places that would not let me (or my 100% male team) in now can't wait till I'm inside and start doting...lol Part of me still is pissed recalling the times I and my colleagues were treated rudely/indifferently by some door-monkey. Actually it usually is a gauntlet of door monkeys, around 6 - 7 everytime but I digress...

As long as I'm on the 2 sides of mumbai again, let me go back and add a bit more about the have/have-not dichotomy again. Rather than drive, I just hire a car/driver for a day/week as I need them. Usually I go for the inexpensive stuff but this time, due to some mixup between the car company's management and its drivers (don't ask..I don't understand it myself either), I somehow, magically, ended up with a brand new Mercedes E-class for 4 days straight rather than my usual blend-in-the-crowd Tata/Toyota, etc..WOW..talk about getting the star treatment everywhere you go just based on the car you arrive in. For eg., rather than getting your car door opened at a 5-star hotel by one guy, you get 3: 1 to open your car door, 1 to make conversation with you as walk to the hotel, and 1 to have the hotel door open lest you breathe in any non-air-conditioned air...LOL. People in the streets, in the buses, in the restaurants will all stop and stare. Pull up in a shiny Merc to any establishment, and you are instantly VIP..kinda fun but it also attracts the beggars at the street lights like honey. So be prepared for non-stop rapping on your window asking for money or selling knick knacks, etc. Since I've been in Mumbai long enough, I have developed a bit of a thicker skin. Rather than give money to *everyone* who asks, I now usually give Rs. 50 to some random beggar and basically chalk that up as my good deed for the day. My fear is that as time wears on, I will quit doing even that as I'm now beginning to get annoyed at the constant interupptions and blatant asks...sigh, this city is going to turn me into a worse human being, I'm afraid in a few more months. Well, that was a downer of a foresight but to wrap this otherwise happy train of throught up, let me just iterate that the last few days, I had a great time with the serendipitous compbination of having my SO here simulatneously with the E-class Merc. Mumbai couldn't get any better in terms of living la vida loca.

As a 30-something, I find that most of the nightspots are run over by young to mid-20-somethings. I haven't yet found a place that caters to a more mature clientele. There are enough youngsters in this city that can afford to blow through Rs. 2-5k on a club that nothing at this price level is likely to keep them away (provided that they have girls in their group of course). Not too bad but it does make me wonder where the 30-somethings desi population goes to relax. I've found some places that are run over by expats (For eg. Shiro) that cater to a slightly older clientele but, by and large, I don't see too many desis hanging out here. It's like the desi crowd gets married and quits going out..? Hoping a desi mumbaikar in this age range can add his/her two cents and clue me in.

Traffic sucks everywhere in mumbai but no where does it suck MORE than in Juhu. My g*d, even sitting in the back of an oversized, over-ac'd, chauffered E-class Merc is a nightmare when it takes 10 minutes to crawl 1 km. Not Bandra, not Andheri, not Worli, not Dadar, not Fort, not Kala Ghoda, not Santa Cruz East...no where is the traffic as bad as it is in Juhu and a perhaps a bit in Santa Cruz West as well. Do yourselves a huge favor and stay out of these areas unless you are planning on making a night out of it. There are some cool places in Juhu (check out Enigma at the Marriott or Aurus at the beach and a couple of the better Italian restaurants in the city) but be prepared to spend hours in the car trying to get/to from these spots. The shopping mall in Juhu that houses the cinema chain PVR is one of the more high end malls in Mumbai (Calvin Klien, Mac, etc..) so I guess that might be another reason to head here. In contrast, I find Bandra West much more navigable. In fact, I'm pretty much convinced that Bandra West is where I would choose to put down roots should this gig lead to something permanent here. So a word or two about my favorite spot in mumbai...

Bandra West: Leafy streets, intimate restaurants, tons of services, good sea front, some of the best looking women, and happening night life all make this my favorite place in Mumbai to be. I've been here so many times now that it almost feels alien to be going to Nariman point, Fort, Juhu..weird I know but man I love this tiny patch of Mumbai. Suits my tastes/needs to a capital Tee.

Some more observations about the work culture:
Yelling is completely normal on a day to day basis to get what you need from your (junior) colleagues. One manager I worked with would always tease his junior about whether his girlfriend was keeping him awake at nights whenever he (the manager) would find mistakes in junior's output, which was quite often. In fact, that brings up a pet peeve of mine. Sloppiness is the rule rather than the exception based on my experience. While you (the expat, the foreign trained, the westerner, etc..) will be held to the highest expectations, both in terms of quality and even more so (probably way more so) in terms of quantity of output produced, the work product you will get back from your Indian colleagues will make you tear your hair out and wish that you could just forget about political-correctedness and just yell at the guy who literally sent you a blank document and called it filled out, etc..

Now, whenever in the presence of superiors (a word I hate but seems commonplace in the work culture here), everyone is a "Sir" or a "Ma'am (very rare but it exists)". I just can't bring myself to call anyone Sir (what are we..in grade 6th?), so I always go by the first name. I also tend to not drop my voice to the merest whisper when in the presence of a "superior". Lastly, I am amazed at the ability of the Indian middle managers to completely change their stance on a topic (& I mean 180 degrees) from what we were discussing a second ago to when a superior walked in and made the barest hint at challenging the underlying assumptions. Leaves me speechless everytime. These middle managers are no "freshers" (another desi term implying someone fresh out of school) but family guys who range from 35-50 years of age. When challenged by their boss, these guys who have no qualms at yelling and belittling their own juniors turn into little yes-men instantly. And just to be clear, I like these guys and respect them for what they have to put up with. Just wish they would develop some more self-respect.

There is no concept of being able to prioritize anything in corporate India (a stretch statement, sure, but seems to hold true but I welcome someone to correct me). Give senior management ten things they should work upon, and what will be expected is that you should get going on all ten things immediately. Very, very odd behavior. Of course, you can just nod your head and conveniently forget about the bottom 5 things the next time you meet, and chances are no one will remember them either..lol. See, the underlying issue is that no one wants to be seen saying no to anything even remotely relevant irrespective of the fact that there are 2-3 *really* important things to accomplish and the rest is just cream.

On a positive note, nothing really fazes the desi colleagues. They adapt to pretty much anything and go with the flow. Actually, that's a mixed bag. On the one hand, it makes them great at being able to think tactically; on the other hand, it really makes it difficult for them to think longer-term, think strategically.

On a funny note, I have never seen so many people get stuffed into the elevators as I see here. People will literally keep on piling into the elevators till you cannot move your elbows anymore. In fact, I'm now guilty of doing the same thing. Where as in the West, I will often let an elevator go that has 5-6 people in it and wait my turn for the next one, here I have no issues any more in adding to an elevator that already is groaning with 10+ people. Having taken the train once for the experience and seeing the bone crushing people density found there, the elevator people density is no where close at all, so it's all good..lol

I really have no point to this post other than to share my personal experiences in mumbai, so please be gentle with the responses

skk

While not agreeing with some, bordering on many, of the characterisations - a wonderful post. Glad you posted. A couple of quick points:

1. Any dance/nightclubs around Ghatkopar(East) - I don't have a good sense of the physical layout of Mumbai btw - I'll be with my sis who lives there ; My wife and I do intend to visit a nightclub or two when we are there - and of course, a hotel near the nightclub would be useful too; I can hardly turn up on my sister's doorstep, 4 am in the morning, wife in tow, the worse for wear.

2. "Freshers" - oddly enough, in the UK, the Asian(I prefer subcontinent-origin but I don't control word-usage) kids born in the late '70/early 80s and now reaching adulthood call their PARENTS "freshies". I'm pretty sure they use it in a derogatory sense.

-skk

Nick-H

Found it fascinating.

Never worked here, but I am so familiar with this being told what people think you want to hear --- and they probably told someone else the opposite two minutes earlier.

sannna

Interesting observations there. I don't know how much is universal truth, as I have not worked here in a corporate environment.

As for Bandra W. I love the neighbourhood for its trees, bungalows, restaurants and all, but I hate it for the chaos, many many beggars and toy/book/flower sellers that try to make their sell through your car/taxi window, the market people that are so eager for your attention that they keep shouting "excuse me!!" and will not give you the opportunity to look at their stuff peacefully, and finally the suicidal and homocidal autorikhsjahs. I am always very tense when I leave there.. happy to be back on the other side of Mahim Creek, where I can browse shops in peace, and am not attacked by riksjahs. And there are as many trees as in Bandra W...