Dating in Goa?

sfrausher

Hello all...

After ten months in India last year, five months traveling the North of the country and five more semi-settled at the same guesthouse near Sudder St. in Calcutta, I've decided to take a look at Goa.
I'm a lonely single looking for the same- someone who would be comfortable meeting my family and traveling with me sometimes. I have a small pension from family- enough to rent a flat and a motorbike- and I have a 10 year visa. I read through the advanced "Teach yourself Hindi" book, but am looking for someone with English as a first language. A native Indian by preference, though I guess I'd consider other expats... I intend to check out a few different parts of Goa- the north and Panjim, before signing a long-term contract.
I'm wondering how open Goan society is, and if any other Indiamikers out there have any success stories to share with me. I imagine between word-of-mouth, discotheques and great-sounding cafés, and matrimonials of all sorts I'll find someone somehow. But I'd like to open up this discussion idea and see where it leads.

Thanks in advance,

--Scott

johnny five

I think that if you are looking to strike up a relationship with a Goan woman, you will be out of luck. Social etiquette just doesnt allow it.
The reverse, however is quite common, with Goan men becoming involved with European women - no consolation to you though!

50cal

I would be interested to know about relationships as well. In regards to etiquette is this just Goan Women you are referring to?
I am planning to hopefully try and meet someone when I retire while I am on my ten year visa, that is if they still offer the ten year visa. Do you think it becomes more difficult as you get up there in age like the gentlemen who started this post? I am thinking that I will draw an early retirement at 62, or sooner if one of my parents passes before then. (my Dad is divorced from second wife, and mom is widow from second husband and I will inherit a pretty large sum of cash) Anyways this is something I have wondered for awhile but never got notion to ask.

johnny five

50cal
I can see where you are coming from, but really the whole of India has a complex way of dealing with what you suggest. The term "relationship" has no meaning here, nor "partner", marriage is the norm and often the two parties have hardly/not met as it will be an arranged marriage. To get involved in this you would need to be in India for a long time as although our money is attractive, culturally and socially we are seen as a lower form.
For enjoying the scenario you describe, I would suggest going further east.

Mod Note:
A portion of this post has been deleted as a consequence of the deletion of another post on this thread.

namaste_cat

Right, as in keep going past the Bay of Bengal on to another country

Johnny five is right about the complexities of relationships even in a more supposedly "western" place like Goa.

Casual hookups between Western women & Goan men are not uncommon, but we're not usually talking about long-term commitment there.

I don't know what it is about Goa but my white husband has never felt more uncomfortable anywhere in India than he did in Goa when we were together (not alone, he was treated fine then). The glares were quite nasty, some even cursed at him like he was taking advantage of me or something. Bizarre.

In my experience there is a real double standard there as White men-Indian women even those in committed relationships get an unfavorable reception. Unless you are looking for a divorced/widowed Indian woman to marry, tread carefully. Even so, unfair though it might seem, reality is non-Indians would typically be quite low on the pecking order.

50cal

Thanks for the feedback, and just to clarify, I was not talking about a one night stand or casual encounter. I would have no issue with potentially marrying a widow or divorced woman.

Nick-H

If you really want to settle down with an Indian woman, then there is no reason why you should not achieve that.

Yes, you will find a majority for whom race/nationality/religion/colour/caste combination requirements are inflexible. That still leaves quite a few for whom they are not. Out of those, set aside (or not, if not applicable) those who want to live in USA, not India, and you will still be left with some.

Now, given that you are choosing from a minority, it might take some time to find your personal team-mate, but it can be done. I guess it took me a year or two. The internet can be a great help. Google Matrimonials and get started!