Chennai: Dressing children?

esteci

Hi,

Our family is planning to stay in Chennai for several months.

I am wondering about the cultural norms for children's clothing.

Is it proper for a young expat girl (kindergarten age) to wear shorts, short skirts and tank tops?

Is it acceptable for an expat boy (primary age) to wear shorts in all environs? Or are there times and places he should rather wear long pants?

I know that white skinned children will generate lots of friendly attention regardless of what they wear. Still, I would like to know what clothing is most culturally appropriate.

Thanks for your insight.

dhans

I'm not sure what the norm is, but you'll see all kind of Indian kids dressed in western wear, including shorts (no tank tops for the girls though ). We also so lots of kids in the kindergarten age in "uniform"(short blue or gray trouswers and white shirt).

Hans

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Nick-H

Nobody cares about 'proper' when it comes to children: don't worry about it at all.

Your daughter will probably be glad to hear that the frilly party frock has almost become a thing of the past!

Normal clothes will be fine, just so long as they are suitable for the temperature.

I wouldn't expect white skinned children to generate any unfriendly attention. Or adults, for that matter!

I hate to think what people might have been telling you ...

Oh...

Of course, your chosen school(s) will let you know their norms and uniform requirements and you will be able to shop accordingly.

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esteci

Thank you for your comments, very helpful.

Nick -- I only know the people of India as warm and kind and I have no misgivings about taking our kids there. Just want to be careful to be culturally sensitive, and to not pack things the kids won't wear.

Nick-H

First thing, then, is to remember that it is never cold here!

Are you coming to Chennai "cold" in another sense of the word? Or have you been here before? I don't know if it is just this site, but it seems to be an increasingly popular ex-pat (I'm assuming work is bring you here?) destination.

So we have quite a few Chennai-related threads here, and I hope you find them useful.

SAHM

Young children here seem to wear (or not wear) what they want. Personally my children get a lot colder here than I do, and my 8 yo dd will wear jeans during this time of year. My son is 5 and wears jeans, shorts, T-shirts, and long-sleeved shirts at will.

You can buy cheap traditional south indian wear for your children if they wish to wear it. There are varieties of styles for the girls but basically all body parts are covered. There is a good children's tailor called "Daffodils" in Adyar. The lady there also can do western girl's dresses. If your girl is a girly-girl (likes to dress up), she will most likely enjoy the range of colorful Indian clothes available here.

Swimsuits are the most important thing to bring. Next are socks and underwear, as well as shoelaces. (In a country where people don't often wear lace-up shoes, these things are hard to find.)

Swimsuits can be very hard to find, so bring a variety.

Some mothers I know (incuding me) try to minimize the amount of attention that their children attract by dressing them modestly (longer skirts/jeans on the girls). Of course it is impossible to not attract attention when your kids are white. Actually, my son is bi-racial and still attracts attention, so I guess I should say "light" and not "white".

At any rate, many children really object to the cheek pinching (they pinch HARD) and many mothers get very upset and frustrated by that. I eventually wound up telling my children that they had permission to hit the person who pinched them, as well as teaching them to say "no" in Tamil. (I got desperate when my dd started refusing to leave the house.) Every mom handles it differently; this is just my solution.

I have to say that outside of the cheek pinching, the Indian people are wonderful and very patient with children. Our 4 yo son bit our driver the first week we lived here - leaving a large bruise - and the man didn't even flinch, let alone quit. I was amazed. (No one pinches our son twice, hee hee, he really didn't need "permission" to hit back.)

Sorry this got slightly off-topic. I will quickly add that India seems to eat children's clothes - my kids have ruined many more clothes here than I thought possible. This is partly because they play outside a great deal more and partly because the laundry systems (whether machine-washed or not) leave much to be desired. India is just dirty, and the dirt doesn't seem to come out very easily.

esteci

SAHM,

Many thanks for the tips!

The kids and I were pinching each other's cheeks this week in preparation.

Question: How do people respond when the kids say no to the cheek pinching? Are they offended?

esteci

Also, SAHM:

Do your kids wear sandals and flip flops out, or does your family prefer to keep feet covered and protected with closed-toe shoes?

And... have you bought your kids' shoes in Chennai?

Nick-H

Cheek pinching is a pain. Even adults are not immune from getting our cheeks pinched by elders .

Oh god... it reminds me of all that "Kiss Aunty So-and-so" that I suffered as an English Child. Err... Please explain to me why I should kiss this stranger?

I guess that was rant!

backpakker

Cottons are ideal and the sun will get hotter as February comes in..so if the children are prone to rashes and sun tans, its better to be dressed accordingly..so norms as such though

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dhans

For some background on avoiding the pinching brigade, read our journal (link below).

Most of the time people are not offended. They may be surprised a bit if you pinch them back (which I did after they pinched my kids, even though they were told not to do so). You'll gt a lot of laughs of all the other people around, when you pinch a 45 year old aunty .

Hans

Nick-H

If I pinched 45-year-old aunties I'd start getting mentioned among the molestation cases !

dhans

Well I got away with it and most aunties understood thereafter that NO means NO (and it kept our kids cheeks in proper order ).

Hans

4gotoIndia

Anyone know the Tamil for 'no pinching'???

Khandoma

I'm sorry to say I'm completely ignorant about Chennai, still I'd like to say a word about Sahm's question on shoes.

I had traveled in Rajasthan before and had worn my trekking shoes day in, day out. But this past November when I hit Mysore, I couldn't bear them for the heat and humidity. I soon bought a pair of local open sandals that I worn throughout my trip, except in Hampi where the paths are rocky when there are any. I am plagued with both large and very sensitive feet, still I had no problems wearing the sandals. Price for one adult pair was 158 rs, leather top and inner sole - and they're nice, too, with glittery stuff.

So you may want to bring something like light tennis shoes for the countryside, and also for the period when your children get used to walking the Indian streets, and buy local sandals when they're ready. From what I saw in Mysore, kids shoes of all styles and sizes are available everywhere.

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