Social taboos pressure lesbian love

passingby

Throughout South Asia, homosexuality has been a taboo subject. There are signs in some areas that gay people are now becoming more open - but that is not always the case. In the latest in a series of articles from the region, Sutapa Mukerjee looks at a problematic lesbian relationship in Allahabad, India.



This is an article on bbc. I am curious to see what debate comes off this one..


read more here

ruins_explorer

The user comments on that article were fascinating, so many different perspectives. The way I was brought up - it's a naturally occuring phenomenon that can only be suppressed by society, but not eliminated. It was interesting for me to read that some people think that it's a function of the media, or too much Westernization, or that a law could prevent people from being gay. Then again, there were people inside and outside of Asia who hold the same opinion I do - that these two women should be allowed the freedom to have a relationship. But it's for each society to decide for itself, I guess. It seems like it was more difficult for these women to be lesbians because their parents were still in control of their lives. I wonder if it is easier to be a gay man in India, whether his parents would keep him under house arrest.

Thanks for sharing the article.

passingby

it is so easy to judge from a westerner perspective, especially from my side since I live in a country where gay people are allowed to marry.

India is a conservative country in many ways, so I guess gay love is pretty much out of the question. I remember watching the movie 'Fire' which created a lot of controversy in India.

I mean, yes, gay people should be allowed to express their love freely, but it will take some time until India will agree to this issue.
India has many other taboos that need to be sort it out. The sexuality is very repressed in the culture.

mira4bai4

One interesting aspect (I have not read the article) but from a discussion in the last few days about a book that my wife had just read written by a Lesbian Uniting Church Minister in Australia and her belief and understanding from a religious perspective (I will be vague here as I can't remember her name or the book title for the present) was that there is (was) no mention of homosexuality in the Bible, there was no word for it even in those times and was a common practice in the Roman period. St Paul or St Peter, not sure which seems to have started the concept that sexual activities were not acceptable, now this was I understand as being pretty well ALL sexual activities as he (who ever) was only interested in spirituality and all else was a block to it. So from this the rest is history on a moral and homophobic journey.

I know in the Path that I follow the various Masters have said that homosexuality is unacceptable and we must have high moral standards in all things. But I do have a problem with this kind of thinking as the Soul has NO sex, NO gender. Everything physical is an Illusion and therefore gender relationships is also an Illusion in Spiritual terms. Now if one indulges in lust and immoral behaviour (immoral as defined as screwing around and such indulgences) out of a marriage type relationship then that is not acceptable as it creates all sorts of trouble generally let alone spiritually. However if one is in a relationship, having one partner of any gender and meditates, is good of heart and pure of mind then that is all that matters.

God does not care about such things, it is the quality of the Heart and Soul that is spoken about by the various 'scriptures', nothing else. If God does not care, why should anyone else put their 2 cents in, making a judgement on an Illusion seems a poor foundation for life.

lotus blossom

tis true, the heart knows nothing of gender, nor age, race, religion or the rest of the trips we like to get all bent out of shape about. the soul is indeed genderless, ageless, without race, etc. the soul is just energy, and if like energy attracts like energy than how divine!

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machadinha

I believe that it's the (much earlier) Biblical book Leviticus which is quite explicit in its condemnation of sodomy as it was known at the time. Check out also Diamanda Galas's rendering of a core verse (on her The Divine Punishment): "When any man hath an issue out of his flesh,/Because of this issue he is unclean..." Quite chilling really.

Like you I don't know how homosexuality would betray a lacking of moral standards but such is organized religion for ya I guess...

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mira4bai4

Yep Leviticus 18 / 22 in my 1860 version has it and one cannot uncover the nakedness of all and sundry either.

crvlvr

generally in india even hetros do not express their love publicly. in some ways this should make it easier for the gays to not feel the pressure to demonstrate their love publically.

what people do in the privacy of their own homes is none of anyone's business -- especially the govt's. Interestingly, most arguments against gays are based on religious beliefs. hinduism is virtually silent on the issue of homosexuality.

An interesting article on "India's Slow Descent Into homophobia" http://www.galva108.org/Indias_Descent.html

cyberhippie

I have a gay friend who is in a relationship in India,( with a guy who works in the temple!!) his take on things is that homesexuality is rife in India (is that the right word?) though very much underground, there is also a lot of experimentation with homosexuality by young men because of the repressed nature of sex in general (rather like one sex public schools in the west).
I agree with others on this though with all the taboos in India society it will be a while before we see a gay pride march on the streets of Delhi.
Not that we should be putting India down for this it took our own societies a long time to legitimise and come to terms with this subject and in the minds of many nothing has changed, want to insult a bloke call him a queer, lass doesn't fancy you she must be a dyke!!
So whilst we have passed a lot of PC laws to benefit gay couples in the minds of many homosexuality is still something dirty and unnatural, our own societies are still evolving with this subject. So we shouldn't see India as being any different in this, a way behind but not so different!

lotus blossom

i wondered about this since some of the boys and men seem so intimate. i've always thought it was strange how the guys are so playful with each other (hand holding, sitting in each others laps, etc.) while practically ignoring the women. i sensed it was based on the need for affection but didn't know if it went beyond that or not. interesting...

machadinha

I wouldn't dare to make any sweeping comments on it but in a society where privacy is often hard to find and relationships with the other sex are strictly regulated, word has it that such convivial dealings can quickly take on a more intimate character yes. They're not necessarily viewed as homosexuality per se either. Also, this doesn't mean you should suspect an intimate relationship behind every male couple you see holding hands.

Not to offend any of our Indian members either. What is interesting in this, and in the Biblical context mentioned above, is that lesbianism is not even recognized, it isn't in the Indian (i.e. Victiorian) law even I believe. I guess this tells us something about how seriously female sexuality is taken.

cyberhippie

I'm not sure I would go that far Lotus, though it may have some part to play! I've often admired the frank intimacy displayed by Indian men in their dealings with each other. I think it's the other side of the coin so often diplayed by men that needs some examination, the macho, unflinching, nothing touches me front so apparent in many men.
I feel this is potentially damaging and shows a huge section of the male public completley out of touch with their inner self because of what society draws up to be a "man"
Indian men or at least a lot of them don't suffer so much under this illusion, the macho front is there but it seems to be for "when the occasion arises" rather than a definition of their manhood!
I spent New Year with a bunch of guys in Bundi and it brought tears to my eyes watching how free and easy men were with each other as they danced all the latest bollywood steps taking it turn to be the heroine, not a trace of self conciencness as they danced their booties off!
And was a stark reminder of how repressed many of us western men are despite all the gloss!

lotus blossom

what a grand image! i would've loved to see that! this sort of openess is one thing that i've always appreciated about indian men, whom i do not assume are all intimate beyond friendship.

cyberhippie

Yeah and what's more they were Bundi's finest a bunch of extremely good looking young blokes, the two American gals there were well impressed I can tell you, I had to keep half an eye on Mrs Cyberhippie

lotus blossom

lol - well, that would've made it all the more exciting!