Pose as married?

machadinha · Feb 14th, 2008, 02:06

Being there with my GF we'd take turns in who would handle the day's finances yes. As Nick says, this would lead to irritation sometimes (as in everyone looking at me, indeed, or even only speaking to me, even if she was clearly handling the money). Beyond that, not a problem as such. Just mildly irritating. Best to ignore as best you can, you're not gonna change it anyway.

Daydream Believer · Feb 14th, 2008, 04:58

Yup - smile sweetly, and hand over your credit card. Job done.

pirossalma · Mar 7th, 2008, 11:26

Quote:

Originally Posted by terreneuve

i've been told that when you are a woman travelling with a man, indian people will most likely speak to the man. but i'm the one with the credit card, the reservations, etc. is this going to be a problem when dealing with hotel clerks, and other people in the service industry?

I had a very funny experience when I booked my first solo India travel. I made the on-line reservation for my name Mrs. P, used credit card on my name. Then I sent questions from my Mrs. P e-mail account, signed as Mrs. P to the hotel about my airport transportation, early check-in etc. I got back these kind of letters:

Dear Sir,
we will send a car for your guest.
Dear Sir,
your guest can check in ...
Dear Sir,
... if your guest need this or that

They all were signed by different employees, so it was not a typo.

Simply they could not accept a woman to make any reservation for herself:-)

Btw I have not seen any other solo woman in this hotel during my one-week stay.

Aishah · Mar 7th, 2008, 12:17

Were they standard form sort of letters? If they were maybe don't know how to change 'sir' to 'madam'. I'm frequently called 'sir' from people who don't know the word 'madam'.Funny isn't it? But maybe innocent errors on their part...

tdmc · Mar 7th, 2008, 12:52

I'm about to travel wife my fiance (not sure when will marry, but that's not important - she's my parnter, irrespective of any paperwork)

So I'm just going to refer to her as "my partner" just as I do here in Oz - I think it works, and it's honest, and can lead to the usual, how long have you been together, how did you meet questions which are ok and we won't have to fudge anyhting

i'd kind of go for honesty first

puchoo · Mar 7th, 2008, 13:07

i would have though that in tourist driven destinations such as Kerala and Goa this would not be a problem. Additionally if one considers the fact that unlike many other destinations this has a very high percentage of foreigners..and thus the culture more open.

I think its better to be honest....a lot of people might not inquire anyway.

dwiner42 · Mar 7th, 2008, 13:08

My gf and I are here together, and I agree it is best to be as vague as possible. We are both 22, but when asked we do tell people we are married.

It's easiest to say you have only been married for 4-6 months. That way you won't have to explain why you don't have kids yet.

Aishah · Mar 7th, 2008, 13:23

tdmc - actually you don't have to do any explanation, unless you get into tricky conversation situations. And much easier if people ask you is this your wife, to white lie and say 'yes'. Don't know that many understand the concept of 'partner'. Maybe will in big cities. They know the word 'friend' however.

reneeautumn · Mar 28th, 2008, 02:32

Hmm. I'm a lesbian, and I was thinking if anyone asked, I would say I'm single. (My girlfriend isn't coming on the trip.) I figured that would be the easiest way out of it. It works on my great-aunts and uncles, anyway.

vireya · Mar 28th, 2008, 04:30

Even if your girlfriend was with you I think you would have less problem. On my last trip there were a lesbian couple who everyone just assumed were friends so there was no hassle at all about them sharing a room.

puchoo · Mar 28th, 2008, 12:19

Totally, its very common here for women to be traveling together or generally hanging out and to be frank 'lesbian' is one of the last things which will come to mind here...

Quote:

Originally Posted by vireya

Even if your girlfriend was with you I think you would have less problem. On my last trip there were a lesbian couple who everyone just assumed were friends so there was no hassle at all about them sharing a room.

reneeautumn · Mar 28th, 2008, 22:04

Wonderful. I remember reading in India you were more likely to see two male friends holding hands than a straight couple, so I figured it would be easy to pass as just friends or, if she doesn't come, say I'm single.

puchoo · Mar 28th, 2008, 22:17

Yep thats true , very true!

Quote:

Originally Posted by reneeautumn

Wonderful. I remember reading in India you were more likely to see two male friends holding hands than a straight couple, .

edwardseco · Mar 28th, 2008, 23:17

Quote:

Seriously??

Its a different country and entitled not to think like a eurocentric (white) one, the Raj is dead if not the bureaucracy..

puchoo · Mar 29th, 2008, 12:46

The bureaucracy just got a new lease of life with the pay commission!

Quote:

Originally Posted by edwardseco

Its a different country and entitled not to think like a eurocentric (white) one, the Raj is dead if not the bureaucracy..

Feb 14th, 2008, 02:06	#46
machadinha brother my cup is empty member Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: yörp Posts: 14,385	Being there with my GF we'd take turns in who would handle the day's finances yes. As Nick says, this would lead to irritation sometimes (as in everyone looking at me, indeed, or even only speaking to me, even if she was clearly handling the money). Beyond that, not a problem as such. Just mildly irritating. Best to ignore as best you can, you're not gonna change it anyway. __________________ Reading tips, all picked up at IndiaMike : INDAX's A Comprehensive Guide To India / Dinoj Surendran's Desi Humor / ITHVC on Culture Shock & Travel Health / JetLag Travel Guides For the Undiscerning Traveller / India Travel Links

Mar 7th, 2008, 12:17	#49
Aishah She-who-must-be-obeyed! Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Jaisalmer Posts: 7,624	Were they standard form sort of letters? If they were maybe don't know how to change 'sir' to 'madam'. I'm frequently called 'sir' from people who don't know the word 'madam'.Funny isn't it? But maybe innocent errors on their part... __________________ "Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards."

Mar 7th, 2008, 13:07	#51
puchoo Maha Guru Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: New Delhi & Himachal Pradesh (Shimla) Posts: 5,411	i would have though that in tourist driven destinations such as Kerala and Goa this would not be a problem. Additionally if one considers the fact that unlike many other destinations this has a very high percentage of foreigners..and thus the culture more open. I think its better to be honest....a lot of people might not inquire anyway. __________________ Cheers! Indiamike Mod team............ puchoo.wordpress.com

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Feb 14th, 2008, 04:58	#47
Daydream Believer Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: London Posts: 90	Yup - smile sweetly, and hand over your credit card. Job done.

Mar 7th, 2008, 12:52	#50
tdmc Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Victoria, Australia Posts: 21	I'm about to travel wife my fiance (not sure when will marry, but that's not important - she's my parnter, irrespective of any paperwork) So I'm just going to refer to her as "my partner" just as I do here in Oz - I think it works, and it's honest, and can lead to the usual, how long have you been together, how did you meet questions which are ok and we won't have to fudge anyhting i'd kind of go for honesty first

Mar 7th, 2008, 13:08	#52
dwiner42 Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Delhi Posts: 2	My gf and I are here together, and I agree it is best to be as vague as possible. We are both 22, but when asked we do tell people we are married. It's easiest to say you have only been married for 4-6 months. That way you won't have to explain why you don't have kids yet.

Mar 7th, 2008, 13:23	#53
Aishah She-who-must-be-obeyed! Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Jaisalmer Posts: 7,624	tdmc - actually you don't have to do any explanation, unless you get into tricky conversation situations. And much easier if people ask you is this your wife, to white lie and say 'yes'. Don't know that many understand the concept of 'partner'. Maybe will in big cities. They know the word 'friend' however.

Mar 28th, 2008, 02:32	#54
reneeautumn Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Florida Posts: 69	Hmm. I'm a lesbian, and I was thinking if anyone asked, I would say I'm single. (My girlfriend isn't coming on the trip.) I figured that would be the easiest way out of it. It works on my great-aunts and uncles, anyway.

Mar 28th, 2008, 04:30	#55
vireya Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Melbourne, Australia Posts: 425	Even if your girlfriend was with you I think you would have less problem. On my last trip there were a lesbian couple who everyone just assumed were friends so there was no hassle at all about them sharing a room.

Mar 28th, 2008, 22:04	#57
reneeautumn Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Florida Posts: 69	Wonderful. I remember reading in India you were more likely to see two male friends holding hands than a straight couple, so I figured it would be easy to pass as just friends or, if she doesn't come, say I'm single.