Blondes- to dye or not to dye? & women's wear, women's safety etc

PeakXV · Nov 25th, 2007, 08:07

Quote:

Originally Posted by dzibead

Actually, the gist of the OP was more specific than simply whether she'd be more conspicuous as a blond (and the answer to that question is more or less self-evidently "yes'). But the real point of the OP was whether she'd be so conspicuous that she should dye her hair a darker color. And the consensus is (less self-evidently), "no".

Well - I think it really comes down to how self-confident the particular traveller is about the issue. If it causes any degree of uneasiness or lack of confidence then it is always there for an option. Many travellers do dye their hair purple, pink, blue, black and have a great Indian visit. It's not a really big deal - but yes blondes tend to stand out more in many places, India is no exception.

As for the SK issue. It doesn't surprise me that the general consensus among experienced, India travelling western women is that they believe to appear less conspicuous wearing Indian garments.

However the ultimate acid test are the impressions & general consensus of Indian men on the issue. Which dress make them look twice or look slightly longer?

A young(er) lady in a jumper and jeans or a young(er) lady in SK, with bindi & henna application? Poll officially started Indian IM'ers!

To be honest the level of travel is also a factor in this - probably with the ashram scene or in around paharganj for example - you might stand out less with native dress. Where as in 5-star travel and/or visiting for business purposes you might possibly stand out more.

Aishah · Nov 25th, 2007, 08:32

Yes, you definitely stand out more in 5star hotels in Delhi! But the level of politeness is such that no one looks at you. My friend and myself and friend's Indian husband went to Imperial Hotel,Delhi,for afternoon tea, both women wearing salwar kameez (and looking smart!)All the Indian ladies staying at the hotel and sitting around were either in Western dress or salwar kameez.
We never felt out of place or conspicuous - nobody turned their heads and stared. We were foreigners in Indian dress but totally accepted. In fact one Indian lady nearby said to us she thought we looked very nice and it was good to see us wearing Indian clothes. When we told her we lived here permanently it led to a short conversation of where etc. and a very pleasant brief chat.

Nick-H · Nov 25th, 2007, 10:26

Salwar won't get you a lot of attention.

Wearing a sari would! People would flock around you to comment. Salwar is much more neutral.

BTW... I know it is not quite the same, but pretty-much nobody stares at me, and I dress not only 100% Indian, but in a style which is now considered rather old-fashioned here. Often, wearing kurta and vesti (dhoti) I will be in a small minority among Indian men mostly wearing shirts and trousers.

More or less the only time I get any attention is when I am with a western visitor: then people will think I'm a tourist too. Otherwise, I seem to have absorbed enough of the body language to fit in. That's my theory, anyway.

Equally, it could be that I am just totally thick and insensitive and don't notice people's reactions!

PeakXV · Nov 25th, 2007, 10:57

The hues, style, fit and associated footwear really can make a world of difference as illustrated in the first two photos of the following article: Of the self and the salwar

.... what I didn't realize was that it is a garment of distinct Muslim origin.

capt_mahajan · Nov 25th, 2007, 11:14

Oh yes, it is. There is a salwaar for men, too, worn more in Pakistan than India.

In North India the salwaar kameez was embraced by many women of all religions a long time ago.

A few decades ago, these were hardly seen in the East and South, though they were getting popular in the West, particularly Mumbai.

It is only in the last 15 years or so, I think, that women throughout India seem to have embraced this. As more women go out to work, it is comfortable, easier to wear and lower maintenance than a sari. Also, in many cases, cheaper.

Nick-H · Nov 25th, 2007, 11:55

Known to many London Indians as the "Punjabi suit", I'm not at all surprised to hear that its origins are Muslim.

I suspect that the main difference between the two photos in the article is climate! trainers/cardigan as against sandals.

More appropriate to show how different the effect might be might have been a picture of the style referred to as looking as if the wearer had been stapled into it --- body hugging and with dupata worn, perhaps, around the neck, where its lines tend to emphasise the feminine form (pause for reverie

) --- and the "coathanger" style, with dupatta worn neatly folded accross the chest for "modesty".

Odd that the garment has become defined in terms of the trousers. The Kameez is the top. Churridar is, essentially, the same kind of trouser suit, but the trouser is different. Sorry, I've forgotten the difference!

Lengha Choli (also mentioned in the article. Essentially, it is skirt and blouse)... I remember well the expensive fancy, embroidered ones in London's Green Street. Indeed, my then GF would wear one for special occasions. I guess it must be a Northern thing.

Aishah · Nov 25th, 2007, 12:05

Great article, Peak XV! I can totally relate to this - and how much nicer looking the girl on the right with her s.k. than the one on the left with tight t-shirt and jeans! (Will probably be rapped on the knuckles by rampant feminists at this point! So will say they both look good in different ways...
But it all comes down to the succinct sentence "liberation is a thing of the mind rather than of what drapes the body".
For comfort, stylish looks etc. you can't beat the salwar kameez!

Sama · Nov 25th, 2007, 12:11

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nick-H

Churridar is, essentially, the same kind of trouser suit, but the trouser is different. Sorry, I've forgotten the difference!

churridar is where the pants are get tighter from the knee down to the ankle?

I like that style more but my healthy sized German/Polish ankles need some help getting into those pants!

I believe tailors can split the seams and make it so it buttons? around the ankle I mean...

Nick-H · Nov 25th, 2007, 12:21

There is a very narrow-ankle style, worn so it (how to put it?) creases up around the ankle at the bottom of the leg.

I think it looks silly!

brownboy66 · Nov 25th, 2007, 17:11

Quote:

Originally Posted by Onecuponly

Damn right I will! Thankyou to everyone who has contributed to this thread. There's been some great insights and the more I read, the more confident and happy I feel about going.

Excellent! You're in for one hell of an experience so good on you for going out there and grabbing it with both hands. Make sure you write up a trip journal on IM

Will be great to see where your adventures take you.

happy travels

Aishah · Nov 25th, 2007, 17:55

Agree with you on the pants style in post 129. As for churridars, they look awful on too thin legs - and not appropriate on fat ones. You have to have pretty good legs to wear them. And yes, I think you could put buttons on the sides and be stylish, Yogagal!

pontesnm · Nov 25th, 2007, 18:52

For better or worse clothes signal information about one's identity. Foreign women who wear salwar kameez signal that they are either tourists who are interested in India as a cultural destination (not just a vacation destination where they want to see the sights and not interact with the locals) or Indian residents (who wish to integrate). The choice is yours. Remember there are several western tourists who wear shorts and skirts especially in Mumbai and Goa.

kalyani68 · Nov 25th, 2007, 19:52

If you really want to shield yourself while wearing a SK or kurti and pants, you can wrap a dupatta to cover your head. Then unless someone is right in front of you, no one will notice that your hair is blonde or red or whatever. Much easier than dying your hair... You might be surprised at how useful that dupatta can be, once you get used to wearing it!

the opoponax · Nov 25th, 2007, 20:46

I love the churidar bottoms, I think because they're very similar to how people are wearing jeans round here lately, except better because a salwar hides the hip and thigh which only a few women can carry off in tight jeans.

I'll also point out that neither SK wearing woman in the photos in that link were wearing their dupattas "across the chest". The top woman is wearing hers more like a winter scarf, wrapped around the neck (though the end bits do drape on the chest), and the bottom woman just has hers tossed over one shoulder. Both look equally natural, in my somewhat greenhorned opinion (between Bollywood, my majority South Asian high school, and a stint living in Queens, I know what a SK is supposed to look like).

PeakXV · Nov 25th, 2007, 20:54

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aishah

Great article, Peak XV! I can totally relate to this - and how much nicer looking the girl on the right with her s.k. than the one on the left with tight t-shirt and jeans! (Will probably be rapped on the knuckles by rampant feminists at this point! So will say they both look good in different ways...

Actually, I was referring to the fact that the first pic SK looked clownish(in color & cut) and if a western lady wore it (especially a blonde or pink

) with nike runners than you can be sure it would draw extra attention. The SK in the second is quite elegant ..... rather nice actually.

Nov 25th, 2007, 08:32	#122
Aishah She-who-must-be-obeyed! Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Jaisalmer Posts: 5,006	Yes, you definitely stand out more in 5star hotels in Delhi! But the level of politeness is such that no one looks at you. My friend and myself and friend's Indian husband went to Imperial Hotel,Delhi,for afternoon tea, both women wearing salwar kameez (and looking smart!)All the Indian ladies staying at the hotel and sitting around were either in Western dress or salwar kameez. We never felt out of place or conspicuous - nobody turned their heads and stared. We were foreigners in Indian dress but totally accepted. In fact one Indian lady nearby said to us she thought we looked very nice and it was good to see us wearing Indian clothes. When we told her we lived here permanently it led to a short conversation of where etc. and a very pleasant brief chat. __________________ "Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards." Last edited by Aishah : Nov 25th, 2007 at 08:32. Reason: Adding hotel location

Nov 25th, 2007, 10:26	#123
Nick-H Loud-mouthed, Noisy Bird Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Chennai, India Posts: 26,829	Salwar won't get you a lot of attention. Wearing a sari would! People would flock around you to comment. Salwar is much more neutral. BTW... I know it is not quite the same, but pretty-much nobody stares at me, and I dress not only 100% Indian, but in a style which is now considered rather old-fashioned here. Often, wearing kurta and vesti (dhoti) I will be in a small minority among Indian men mostly wearing shirts and trousers. More or less the only time I get any attention is when I am with a western visitor: then people will think I'm a tourist too. Otherwise, I seem to have absorbed enough of the body language to fit in. That's my theory, anyway. Equally, it could be that I am just totally thick and insensitive and don't notice people's reactions! __________________ . Just one member of the IndiaMike Mod Team

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Nov 25th, 2007, 10:57	#124
PeakXV Naan.tering Nabob Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Abode of Glooscap Posts: 4,195	The hues, style, fit and associated footwear really can make a world of difference as illustrated in the first two photos of the following article: Of the self and the salwar .... what I didn't realize was that it is a garment of distinct Muslim origin.

Nov 25th, 2007, 11:14	#125
capt_mahajan (in charge of navel affairs) Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: India Posts: 10,105	Oh yes, it is. There is a salwaar for men, too, worn more in Pakistan than India. In North India the salwaar kameez was embraced by many women of all religions a long time ago. A few decades ago, these were hardly seen in the East and South, though they were getting popular in the West, particularly Mumbai. It is only in the last 15 years or so, I think, that women throughout India seem to have embraced this. As more women go out to work, it is comfortable, easier to wear and lower maintenance than a sari. Also, in many cases, cheaper.

Nov 25th, 2007, 11:55	#126
Nick-H Loud-mouthed, Noisy Bird Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Chennai, India Posts: 26,829	Known to many London Indians as the "Punjabi suit", I'm not at all surprised to hear that its origins are Muslim. I suspect that the main difference between the two photos in the article is climate! trainers/cardigan as against sandals. More appropriate to show how different the effect might be might have been a picture of the style referred to as looking as if the wearer had been stapled into it --- body hugging and with dupata worn, perhaps, around the neck, where its lines tend to emphasise the feminine form (pause for reverie ) --- and the "coathanger" style, with dupatta worn neatly folded accross the chest for "modesty". Odd that the garment has become defined in terms of the trousers. The Kameez is the top. Churridar is, essentially, the same kind of trouser suit, but the trouser is different. Sorry, I've forgotten the difference! Lengha Choli (also mentioned in the article. Essentially, it is skirt and blouse)... I remember well the expensive fancy, embroidered ones in London's Green Street. Indeed, my then GF would wear one for special occasions. I guess it must be a Northern thing.

Nov 25th, 2007, 12:05	#127
Aishah She-who-must-be-obeyed! Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Jaisalmer Posts: 5,006	Great article, Peak XV! I can totally relate to this - and how much nicer looking the girl on the right with her s.k. than the one on the left with tight t-shirt and jeans! (Will probably be rapped on the knuckles by rampant feminists at this point! So will say they both look good in different ways... But it all comes down to the succinct sentence "liberation is a thing of the mind rather than of what drapes the body". For comfort, stylish looks etc. you can't beat the salwar kameez!

Nov 25th, 2007, 12:21	#129
Nick-H Loud-mouthed, Noisy Bird Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Chennai, India Posts: 26,829	There is a very narrow-ankle style, worn so it (how to put it?) creases up around the ankle at the bottom of the leg. I think it looks silly!

Nov 25th, 2007, 17:55	#131
Aishah She-who-must-be-obeyed! Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Jaisalmer Posts: 5,006	Agree with you on the pants style in post 129. As for churridars, they look awful on too thin legs - and not appropriate on fat ones. You have to have pretty good legs to wear them. And yes, I think you could put buttons on the sides and be stylish, Yogagal!

Nov 25th, 2007, 18:52	#132
pontesnm Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Bardez/Mumbai/New Jersey (USA) Posts: 219	For better or worse clothes signal information about one's identity. Foreign women who wear salwar kameez signal that they are either tourists who are interested in India as a cultural destination (not just a vacation destination where they want to see the sights and not interact with the locals) or Indian residents (who wish to integrate). The choice is yours. Remember there are several western tourists who wear shorts and skirts especially in Mumbai and Goa.

Nov 25th, 2007, 19:52	#133
kalyani68 Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Midwest USA Posts: 210	If you really want to shield yourself while wearing a SK or kurti and pants, you can wrap a dupatta to cover your head. Then unless someone is right in front of you, no one will notice that your hair is blonde or red or whatever. Much easier than dying your hair... You might be surprised at how useful that dupatta can be, once you get used to wearing it!

Nov 25th, 2007, 20:46	#134
the opoponax Maha Guru Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Brooklyn, via New Orleans Posts: 1,054	I love the churidar bottoms, I think because they're very similar to how people are wearing jeans round here lately, except better because a salwar hides the hip and thigh which only a few women can carry off in tight jeans. I'll also point out that neither SK wearing woman in the photos in that link were wearing their dupattas "across the chest". The top woman is wearing hers more like a winter scarf, wrapped around the neck (though the end bits do drape on the chest), and the bottom woman just has hers tossed over one shoulder. Both look equally natural, in my somewhat greenhorned opinion (between Bollywood, my majority South Asian high school, and a stint living in Queens, I know what a SK is supposed to look like).

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