Worst Toilet Experience

Ali-Monbeam · Apr 22nd, 2008, 21:33

There must be a special way of using them so as not to get your lovely sari dipped...........

Piper · Apr 22nd, 2008, 23:15

Worst toilet was in China, hands down, but worst toilet experience...well, that belongs to India for me. Mysore Palace, the one that looks like Buckingham.

Let's just say it is a pretty sad day when you squint in the dark to look through your handbag (if you're lucky enough to have one) and you have to make some very tough decisions, on the fly...

Which business receipts are not high-value enough to ensure they are saved for claiming back from the company?

How much does Rs 5 & Rs 10 equate to in my native currency, and how many do I have?

How much do you wish you'd listened to your 'sadder but wiser' friend who warned you about this VERY THING, in this VERY CITY...?

vistet · Apr 23rd, 2008, 01:31

Quote:

Originally Posted by Piper

it is a pretty sad day when you squint in the dark ..

Reminds me on a few extra useful points about Tibetan toilets, which I´m glad to say does not come from personal experience :

* stepping in to a dark toilet , don´t assume the light switch is in any given position

* don´t assume the floor is in any given position

* hurtling through the air most people start off comments somewhere along the the line of "ooo.. " . Close your mouth instead.

* family toilets with moderate loads and earth added , will produce a thudding sound as you land. The Potalas toilet , that services thousands of tea drinkers and no earth added, will produce a plopping sound . Remember the point about keeping your mouth shut ?

*if you have a phone , now is the time to phone ahead to your hotel and arrange something with hoses in the front yard , so you can actually get back to your room .

Nick-H · Apr 23rd, 2008, 01:42

Worst toilet experience... I hate the way small children are commonly put on tables in restaurants. There is all sorts of stuff in India about feet and shoes, then a kid gets picked up off the floor and put on the surface people have to eat off. That is disgusting.

But most disgusting was the time I saw a little girl sat on a table and then watched the pool of urine spreading out from her.

Its a very good thing I'm a wimp with no muscles: I would have liked to have rubbed the parents' noses in it!

Funniest toilet experience: aboard a yacht off the Cornish coast in slightly bouncy weather. Pictures would be worth a million words, but try to imagine:

Boat rolls sharply to one side.
Toilet door flies open
man with trousers around ankles staggers out.

Boat rolls sharply back again,
man staggers backwards back to toilet.
Door shuts.

It's that trousers around the ankles three-inch-steps stagger that just made it perfect. I can't really spell what he said!

puchoo · Apr 23rd, 2008, 11:30

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nick-H

Worst

Boat rolls sharply to one side.
Toilet door flies open
man with trousers around ankles staggers out.

Boat rolls sharply back again,
man staggers backwards back to toilet.
Door shuts.

Nick-H · Apr 23rd, 2008, 14:25

All happened in about two seconds. He never had a chance to grab anything. Luckily the second roll put him back where he started!

puchoo · Apr 23rd, 2008, 14:45

We can only hope it did!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nick-H

Al Luckily the second roll put him back where he started!

brishti · Apr 23rd, 2008, 14:50

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nick-H

All happened in about two seconds. He never had a chance to grab anything. Luckily the second roll put him back where he started!

shippendale

:brishti

Nick-H · Apr 23rd, 2008, 15:25

Another yacht toilet story: a friend of mine was thrown so heavily against the bulkhead that all the screws securing it to the deck were sheared!

One of my first yachting toilet experiences taught me what it is like to be a match in a matchbox that someone is shaking!

xyka · Apr 23rd, 2008, 16:43

I'm trying my best to avoid reading this topic but some memories keep haunting me so I might as well get it off my system.

Here goes.

A road trip in the hills of Maharashtra many monsoons ago led to an upset tummy and the urgent desire to find a toilet. Passing by a small town I saw a rural telephone exchange and decided to check out their shanks. It was okay, not too bad as the others mentioned upthread but there was a giant frog inside who thought he was a tiddlywink. I tried to shoo him out of the toilet door instead his olympics qualifying long jump scored a hole in one.

So there he was right down there competing with my urgency.
I had no choice but to take revenge on him and hurry out asap.

Since then every time I pass by a rural telephone exchange I floor the accelerator. Never again.

brownboy66 · Apr 23rd, 2008, 16:53

sort of gives new meaning to toad in the hole...

xyka · Apr 23rd, 2008, 17:24

Quote:

Originally Posted by brownboy66

sort of gives new meaning to toad in the hole...

xyka · Apr 23rd, 2008, 17:26

Quote:

Originally Posted by brownboy66

sort of gives new meaning to toad in the hole...

some key words come to mind.

dzibead · Apr 24th, 2008, 06:47

This thread has made me laugh so hard I almost has a "toilet experience" right at my desk!

04274108 · Apr 24th, 2008, 07:01

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nick-H

Boat rolls sharply to one side.
Toilet door flies open
man with trousers around ankles staggers out.

Boat rolls sharply back again,
man staggers backwards back to toilet.
Door shuts.

It's that trousers around the ankles three-inch-steps stagger that just made it perfect. I can't really spell what he said!

Nick, that is freakin' brilliant! I'm wiping spatted rice off my monitor after reading that one! Did you get to see the first mate's log?!

Apr 23rd, 2008, 01:42	#109
Nick-H Loud-mouthed, Noisy Bird Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Chennai, India Posts: 27,692	Worst toilet experience... I hate the way small children are commonly put on tables in restaurants. There is all sorts of stuff in India about feet and shoes, then a kid gets picked up off the floor and put on the surface people have to eat off. That is disgusting. But most disgusting was the time I saw a little girl sat on a table and then watched the pool of urine spreading out from her. Its a very good thing I'm a wimp with no muscles: I would have liked to have rubbed the parents' noses in it! Funniest toilet experience: aboard a yacht off the Cornish coast in slightly bouncy weather. Pictures would be worth a million words, but try to imagine: Boat rolls sharply to one side. Toilet door flies open man with trousers around ankles staggers out. Boat rolls sharply back again, man staggers backwards back to toilet. Door shuts. It's that trousers around the ankles three-inch-steps stagger that just made it perfect. I can't really spell what he said! __________________ . Just one member of the IndiaMike Mod Team

Apr 23rd, 2008, 16:53	#116
brownboy66 Chicken 65 Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: New Delhi Posts: 2,290	sort of gives new meaning to toad in the hole... __________________ "the last meal is history - its the next one that's important" - Garfield (the cat) IndiaMike Mod Team.... just some plonker with access to the mod tools

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Apr 22nd, 2008, 21:33	#106
Ali-Monbeam Less of the 'Senior' member! Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Bradford Posts: 446	There must be a special way of using them so as not to get your lovely sari dipped...........

Apr 22nd, 2008, 23:15	#107
Piper Standard-issue lurker Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Bangalore Posts: 76	Worst toilet was in China, hands down, but worst toilet experience...well, that belongs to India for me. Mysore Palace, the one that looks like Buckingham. Let's just say it is a pretty sad day when you squint in the dark to look through your handbag (if you're lucky enough to have one) and you have to make some very tough decisions, on the fly... Which business receipts are not high-value enough to ensure they are saved for claiming back from the company? How much does Rs 5 & Rs 10 equate to in my native currency, and how many do I have? How much do you wish you'd listened to your 'sadder but wiser' friend who warned you about this VERY THING, in this VERY CITY...?

Apr 23rd, 2008, 14:25	#111
Nick-H Loud-mouthed, Noisy Bird Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Chennai, India Posts: 27,692	All happened in about two seconds. He never had a chance to grab anything. Luckily the second roll put him back where he started!

Apr 23rd, 2008, 15:25	#114
Nick-H Loud-mouthed, Noisy Bird Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Chennai, India Posts: 27,692	Another yacht toilet story: a friend of mine was thrown so heavily against the bulkhead that all the screws securing it to the deck were sheared! One of my first yachting toilet experiences taught me what it is like to be a match in a matchbox that someone is shaking!

Apr 23rd, 2008, 16:43	#115
xyka Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Bangalore Posts: 39	I'm trying my best to avoid reading this topic but some memories keep haunting me so I might as well get it off my system. Here goes. A road trip in the hills of Maharashtra many monsoons ago led to an upset tummy and the urgent desire to find a toilet. Passing by a small town I saw a rural telephone exchange and decided to check out their shanks. It was okay, not too bad as the others mentioned upthread but there was a giant frog inside who thought he was a tiddlywink. I tried to shoo him out of the toilet door instead his olympics qualifying long jump scored a hole in one. So there he was right down there competing with my urgency. I had no choice but to take revenge on him and hurry out asap. Since then every time I pass by a rural telephone exchange I floor the accelerator. Never again.

Apr 24th, 2008, 06:47	#119
dzibead Maha Guru Member Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Northern California Posts: 2,156	This thread has made me laugh so hard I almost has a "toilet experience" right at my desk!

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