| Humour - It Only Happens in India - The Bizarre, the Strange, and the Unexpected. Share your Experiences. |
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#1 |
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Member
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Salt Spring Island B.C. Canada
Posts: 90
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Horn Honking
Here's a fun email I got from a friend who's spent considerable time in India
In response to the question: "Why do you honk your horn?" Because it is there. It adds auditory colour to the intricate visual tapestry of day-to-day street existence. I bought it; I'm gonna use it. It is part of an essential bat-like sonar echolocation system. I beep, therefore I am. It stimulates milk production in the cows. It scares off potential attackers as I run the gauntlet. My horn switch has only one position. A hammer is to pound things with; a horn...duh! It helps keep me awake. (Popular with over-night bus drivers) Without my horn I feel forlorn. I beep it all the day. I cannot see How I could be Not honking through the fray. |
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#2 |
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Member
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You have it ....blow it
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#3 | |
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brother my cup is empty member
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: yörp
Posts: 14,391
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Quote:
Excellent Ken, glad to see that punctured lung did nothing to your sense of humor.
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Reading tips, all picked up at IndiaMike : INDAX's A Comprehensive Guide To India / Dinoj Surendran's Desi Humor / ITHVC on Culture Shock & Travel Health / JetLag Travel Guides For the Undiscerning Traveller / India Travel Links
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#4 |
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Senior Member
Join Date: May 2005
Location: UK
Posts: 192
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One of my friends came to the UK from India. He got a license to drive in England.
Can you imagine the time we spent stopping him from tooting all the time!! He got the message in the end! Chris. |
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#5 |
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i like to go through obsessions...
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HAHAHH thats excellent.
i didnt know indians constantly honked.... but now, i will know the reasons and thus will save myself one unanswered question once im there cheers and beers!
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Bedazzled by Brilliance? Or Baffled by Bullshit?
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#6 |
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Honorary Mod
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: McLaren Vale, South Australia
Posts: 1,217
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Here in Adelaide I don't think I have heard a car horn in a year and a half! I think to be on the receiving end of a horn blast here is taken personally!
On the one occasion a used my horn here I got a driver (who was in the wrong) flash his lights at me and drive close behind gesturing aggressively as if he wanted to stop and fight!!! In India its totally different - using the car horn is almost a common courtesy!!! rab
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IndiaMike Mod Team (The Honorary One)
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#7 |
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Member
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Australia
Posts: 43
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The only time I can ever remember wanting to honk my horn, it took me so long to figure out how to use it that the moment to honk had passed.
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#8 |
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Maha Guru Member
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: The OC
Posts: 993
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This story is not from India!
One day, a guy was driving with his four-year-old daughter and beeped his car horn by mistake. She turned and looked at him for an explanation. He said, "I did that by accident." She replied, "I know that, daddy." He replied, "How'd you know?" The girl said, "Because you didn't say 'JERK' afterwards!" |
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#9 |
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Lost in translation
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: India !
Posts: 2,233
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“Horn OK Please” is the world’s largest orchestra. The good news is that its free and moves with you
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#10 |
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21st Century Freak
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...hee hee hee
yea Indians that way are obedient to only this remark at the rear of every big vehicle... but somehow they seem to blind themselves for that two character letter "No" in "No Parking" and gleefully park their vehicles right at the board.....thats India for sure!!! |
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#11 |
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Maha Guru Member
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: nasik, maharastra
Posts: 1,261
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honking of horns are prohibited in the zones of hospitals and schools.
in other places, it is customary to honk and let the drivers around you know of your presence. it is supposed to help reduce accidents.
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mooning over a moon journey |
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#12 |
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This is just a cameo appearance
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Chennai, India
Posts: 36,213
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Because slowing down at a junction to see if anyone is coming is just too much trouble,, and why bother anyway when you have no intention of stopping for them!
By the way: I hate the way my Indian friends drive in London... It's by-the-book for the first week after they pass they UK test and then it's back to leaving three inches to the car in front and trying to overtake between lanes... |
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#13 |
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Lost in translation
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: India !
Posts: 2,233
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My office is a few kilometers from my home.
I start the car and honk the horn mildly – to check if it’s working in perfect order Then I honk when I pull the car out of my gate – to alert anyone coming from behind the neighbor’s car, which is parked 2 inches from my car’s bumper. I drive slowly for a few meters in the residential area - I don’t honk. No use, because everyone here knows me, and none would move even if I honk! A few more meters – honk..honk..- This is where the lane from the neighborhood block joins ours. A few more meters- HOOOOOONK- the narrow lane joins the main road. This long honk marks the end of my ‘good chap in the neighborhood’ status. Now I’ve to deal with the failed schumachers and Kamikase drivers and UFOs (with wheels)…not to mention the newly wed cows and their husbands on the morning walk at the middle of the road. Honk …(at the boy trying to cross the road). Honk ( at the autorickshaw ahead of me who tried to make a MiG29 style U turn ) Honk ( at the truck who just overtook me from the left) Honk (at the two taxi drivers cracking a joke at the middle of the road) Honk (at the lady driving the mopped with an L board hooked to the tail lamp) Honk (at the curve ahead) Honk (not for any particular reason…) Honk (at the junction ahead) Honk (no one else is honking , for the past 2 minutes) Honk…HONK..Honk…HONK …(that’s from my friend’s car behind. That’s how good morning is wished ) Honk…HONK..Honk…HONK … (I return the curtsey) Honk…..Hoooonk…Honk…Hooonk…(so meone is saying ‘look, my car is new!’) ….. ….. ….. …..just another normal day to the work ![]() |
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#14 |
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21st Century Freak
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hee hee heee
this will perfectly convince ppl out there as to why indians are into this "bad" , "impolite" habit of honking every now and then.... |
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#15 | |
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Member
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Impolite ?
Quote:
I honk to tell the vehicle in front of me NOT to take any sudden twists & turns while I am trying to overtake him. LOL ;-)...sometimes I honk when I see a nice gal passing by... sometimes to express my anger... It helps in the game of "who-will-blink-first" ....scares the other guy & makes him blink. So a horn is a "tool for expressing yoursel"...my advice would be to use it in your countries too...life will be really cool... |
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