Closed doors

FarNorth · Feb 15th, 2007, 06:55

I just got back from India and I really loved it, so many stories and people, it was fantastic...but one thing I was continually surprised with was that whenever I was in a hotel room and I called for food or they were bringing me something, there was a knock and then an immediate entering!!

If the door wasn't locked and bolted they came on in like it was their own room and some even tryed to hang out and watch TV with me!!

I love India...

crvlvr · Feb 15th, 2007, 07:04

In india doors are bolted shut if ones intends keep out visitors.

batistuta · Feb 15th, 2007, 07:56

The concept of Privacy is yet to catch up.Along with bolting into rooms they may even stand and watch what you are writing if you are taking notes in a diary or just plain staring at you.
Great that you loved it cos it annoys many westerners no end.

ninasimone · Feb 15th, 2007, 09:01

I used to laugh to myself when I would go to pay for something and i had the person to be paid, as well as a few onlookers observe what was inside my wallet. I never felt they wanted to take anything from me, but they sure were curious.

malcolmgrundy · Feb 15th, 2007, 09:37

We have been living in india and privacy is unheard of unless you keep everything locked a few examples: we had an indian friend around for a meal when our mobile rung with a text message our friend picked the phone up read the message and told us it what the message was then turned the message off and placed the phone back as if it was his we couldnt stop laughing. We also use the same taxi driver all the time and everytime he comes into our flat he goes to the kitchen looks in our fridges and cupboards as if they are his own and asks what this or that is if he has'nt seen it before.Our next door neighbour security gaurd etc will just walk in for a chat uninvited if our door is open this is india and we both love it.

icetea · Feb 15th, 2007, 11:55

It helps if you are a woman (especially a married one): then Indian men are sure to keep a very respectful distance from you or your belongings

malcolmgrundy, with friends I'm sure those things happen. But with taxi drivers and the so-called "lower-class" people coming to one's house, well I guess you have to know them for a pretty long time for these things to happen! Otherwise, most of these people are almost as if scared to approach the door, and when they talk you can't get them out of "yes, sir", "yes, mam" and their half-bowing attitude! I can't imagine them walking in just like that and checking out my kitchen, really.

But the boy who brings us water does look around pretty freely, ask questions and watch some TV too while doing his job.

That, I guess, is just because he's been coming to the house for a long time.

aghori · Feb 15th, 2007, 12:20

It is funny, it seems as they don't think that maybe you are undressed in your room, and even when the door locked they put effort to enter, without waiting you to open.
Also i stayed in hotel on 2d floor with ledge under windows, and people were walking there even at night with excuse "run after monkey"

. And once manager also walked there impudently

staring at my window, and when i complained about that, he just said "In India we have a custome to look at one's windows".

So I will never stay there again.
At about privacy, I learned not to speak something to Indians about myself unless I want it to know also all their closest friends.

icetea · Feb 15th, 2007, 12:27

Quote:

Originally Posted by aghori

At about privacy, I learned not to speak something to Indians about myself unless I want it to know also all their closest friends.

That's true. But the good side of this is that when you talk to someone about a problem, you suddenly find that a whole network of unknown people is jumping to help or advise you...

Nick-H · Feb 15th, 2007, 14:25

...a bit like IndiaMike!

ananda2193 · Feb 15th, 2007, 19:17

When I was in Naini Tal one time the guy working at my hotel knocked on my door for some reason, I don't remember why. When I opened it he walked right in. I had a bottle of whisky on the table. He asks me if he could have some.

I gave him a little as I'm the sharing kind of guy. But then as he's leaving he ask's for a tip.

At that point I told him to Get the F*** out. I almost reported him to the manager, but it's not in my nature to get someone in trouble or possible loose their job. But when I saw him after that he didn't give me very nice looks.

saajan_20 · Feb 15th, 2007, 19:30

Quote:

Originally Posted by FarNorth

I just got back from India and I really loved it, so many stories and people, it was fantastic...but one thing I was continually surprised with was that whenever I was in a hotel room and I called for food or they were bringing me something, there was a knock and then an immediate entering!!

If the door wasn't locked and bolted they came on in like it was their own room and some even tryed to hang out and watch TV with me!!

I love India...

As they know you are in you have called for their service they are more than happy to help you and are curious it can be taken in that manner too !!!!

ravips29 · Feb 15th, 2007, 22:00

Quote:

Originally Posted by icetea

That's true. But the good side of this is that when you talk to someone about a problem, you suddenly find that a whole network of unknown people is jumping to help or advise you...

Hmmm...sounds a lot like India Mike

ravips29 · Feb 15th, 2007, 22:02

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nick-H

...a bit like IndiaMike!

Okay, sorry Nick, hadn't read your post before responding...what can I say, great minds think alike!

CliveG · Feb 16th, 2007, 00:03

I had to take my wife to a hospital near Thekkady a fw years ago and our taxi driver and his boss not only escorted us into the hosptial but came into the consultation room while my wife was examined. Then they followed us to the treatment room! Mind you they did then go and find us a cup of coffee for which we were grateful.

Nick-H · Feb 16th, 2007, 00:04

ravips29... I was going to say... i thought that was my post!

Heck... you're welcome to share it

Generally on the subject of the thread i'd say...

It is necessary to assert one's space and establish one's boundaries. Do not let people do stuff that makes you feel uncomfortable.

Feb 15th, 2007, 06:55	#1
FarNorth Member Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Alaska Posts: 20	Closed doors I just got back from India and I really loved it, so many stories and people, it was fantastic...but one thing I was continually surprised with was that whenever I was in a hotel room and I called for food or they were bringing me something, there was a knock and then an immediate entering!! If the door wasn't locked and bolted they came on in like it was their own room and some even tryed to hang out and watch TV with me!! I love India...

Feb 15th, 2007, 12:20	#7
aghori Senior Member Join Date: May 2004 Location: Russia/Goverdhan Posts: 189	It is funny, it seems as they don't think that maybe you are undressed in your room, and even when the door locked they put effort to enter, without waiting you to open. Also i stayed in hotel on 2d floor with ledge under windows, and people were walking there even at night with excuse "run after monkey". And once manager also walked there impudently staring at my window, and when i complained about that, he just said "In India we have a custome to look at one's windows". So I will never stay there again. At about privacy, I learned not to speak something to Indians about myself unless I want it to know also all their closest friends.

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Feb 15th, 2007, 07:04	#2
crvlvr Guru Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Hollywood Posts: 4,668	In india doors are bolted shut if ones intends keep out visitors.

Feb 15th, 2007, 07:56	#3
batistuta Maha Guru Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Bangalore Posts: 1,727	The concept of Privacy is yet to catch up.Along with bolting into rooms they may even stand and watch what you are writing if you are taking notes in a diary or just plain staring at you. Great that you loved it cos it annoys many westerners no end.

Feb 15th, 2007, 09:01	#4
ninasimone Here comes the Sun Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: sydney australia Posts: 193	I used to laugh to myself when I would go to pay for something and i had the person to be paid, as well as a few onlookers observe what was inside my wallet. I never felt they wanted to take anything from me, but they sure were curious.

Feb 15th, 2007, 09:37	#5
malcolmgrundy Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: india Posts: 31	We have been living in india and privacy is unheard of unless you keep everything locked a few examples: we had an indian friend around for a meal when our mobile rung with a text message our friend picked the phone up read the message and told us it what the message was then turned the message off and placed the phone back as if it was his we couldnt stop laughing. We also use the same taxi driver all the time and everytime he comes into our flat he goes to the kitchen looks in our fridges and cupboards as if they are his own and asks what this or that is if he has'nt seen it before.Our next door neighbour security gaurd etc will just walk in for a chat uninvited if our door is open this is india and we both love it.

Feb 15th, 2007, 11:55	#6
icetea 'sort of hate India' club member Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Chennai, via Romania Posts: 917	It helps if you are a woman (especially a married one): then Indian men are sure to keep a very respectful distance from you or your belongings malcolmgrundy, with friends I'm sure those things happen. But with taxi drivers and the so-called "lower-class" people coming to one's house, well I guess you have to know them for a pretty long time for these things to happen! Otherwise, most of these people are almost as if scared to approach the door, and when they talk you can't get them out of "yes, sir", "yes, mam" and their half-bowing attitude! I can't imagine them walking in just like that and checking out my kitchen, really. But the boy who brings us water does look around pretty freely, ask questions and watch some TV too while doing his job. That, I guess, is just because he's been coming to the house for a long time.

Feb 15th, 2007, 14:25	#9
Nick-H This is just a cameo appearance Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Chennai, India Posts: 36,225	...a bit like IndiaMike!

Feb 15th, 2007, 19:17	#10
ananda2193 Maha Guru Member Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: you essay Posts: 1,904	When I was in Naini Tal one time the guy working at my hotel knocked on my door for some reason, I don't remember why. When I opened it he walked right in. I had a bottle of whisky on the table. He asks me if he could have some. I gave him a little as I'm the sharing kind of guy. But then as he's leaving he ask's for a tip. At that point I told him to Get the F*** out. I almost reported him to the manager, but it's not in my nature to get someone in trouble or possible loose their job. But when I saw him after that he didn't give me very nice looks.

Feb 16th, 2007, 00:03	#14
CliveG Maha Guru Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: PORTSMOUTH U.K. Posts: 932	I had to take my wife to a hospital near Thekkady a fw years ago and our taxi driver and his boss not only escorted us into the hosptial but came into the consultation room while my wife was examined. Then they followed us to the treatment room! Mind you they did then go and find us a cup of coffee for which we were grateful.

Feb 16th, 2007, 00:04	#15
Nick-H This is just a cameo appearance Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Chennai, India Posts: 36,225	ravips29... I was going to say... i thought that was my post! Heck... you're welcome to share it Generally on the subject of the thread i'd say... It is necessary to assert one's space and establish one's boundaries. Do not let people do stuff that makes you feel uncomfortable.