A Lot Can Happen Over Coffee !

Malkers

Anger, annoyance, frustration, time ticking by, in fact anything but the bloody coffee itself.

Well a post about this famous chain is well overdue and the straw finally crushed that camel to the earth this weekend in Ooty of all places. I mean Bangalore's outlets get up your nose but this was truly classic!

So off we strolled on a fine Sunday morning down the hill towards Ooty town centre and as anyone who knows the place knows you can't help but stop for a quick cuppa in this place to set you up for the day, I mean it's one of those safety factors that draws you in the same way as those big golden arches of another famous chain, you know its pretty crap but it is usually the same crap served by the same crap staff throughout the world, anyway I digress! So in we trot, "2 large cappucinos please, 1 with red eye and 2 mud pies" (for those who don't know red eye is a hefty shot of strong espresso for that extra boost and to lift the coffee into something drinkable), "certainly sir" . We sat down!

After 10 minutes our pies arrived, 10 minutes for 6 staff to serve 2 cold pieces of already cut pies when there was not another customer in sight, that is except for the family of 6 from Gujurat who had just arrived and sat down to drink from their own flasks, and, before you ask, nobody said a word to them So I'm sat there with a dilemma, no coffee but a lovely piece of dry mud cake burning my hungry eyes Now I don't know about you but when I order something with coffee then thats exactly what I order, a bite of cake, a slurp of coffee, back to the cake and so on, it is the whole point. So I had a nibble, then another until damn me the whole thing has gone and the remnants stuck like concrete to the roof of my mouth with nothing there to cleanse it! I enquired the whereabouts of my coffee, "Its coming soon sir" "Ok" says I, in the meantime do you have an ashtray and a daily paper I can read, "yes sir"! Bear in mind its now 20 minutes since I ordered my coffee!

10 minutes later the paper arrived along with the dirty ashtray (the ashtray cleaner was off apparently). I remember from my last visit that they always staple the paper to stop the wind blowing it all across the forecourt, makes perfect sense as it is quite windy there. Only they had made a small error, they had forgotten to unfold the paper before stapling it So here I am trying to read the sports pages with blood dripping out from the back of my fingernail all over the bloody paper. It is now 30 minutes and a guy pulls up on a motorbike with a heavy sack on the tank, you guessed it, the milk So all this time they'd had no milk and had not bothered to tell me.

35 minutes and the waiter is heading my way............. with 1 cup on his tray, he puts it down and I explain that 2 have been ordered, he says "other is coming sir", so I asked which of the ones is this, "the one with red eye sir", thats mine then so I rip a sugar and pop it in, take a slurp feckin dishwater!!! He comes immediately back with the other cup (so why he couldn't have brought both together only heaven knows and that's doubtful!) and I tell him this is way too weak, he tells me "actually sir, this is the one with red eye", great so I grab that one and hand mine over to Jen and the waiter dissapears! Hold on, Jen don't take sugar "Waiter" I called, can you change this one for me because you told me it was mine so I put sugar in it but my wife (I gave up trying to explain the meaning behind fiance long ago) doesn't take sugar! "Sorry sir", then 5 minutes later he brings another large bowl of dishwater. At this time I asked for the bill as I realised that this task might be a little difficult too. They have a new system these days where the bill is supposed to be brought out with your order so that there is no waiting around at the end. In fact all this does is reduce the wasted time from 20 minutes to 10 minutes and spoils your coffee experience whilst you rant about how they have completely f***ed up your bill.

So, our coffee is completely finished and its 45 minutes since we arrived at this empty cafe with 6 staff with the brains of a cricket bat, or maybe thats a bit insulting to a cricket bat. Still no bill. Meanwhile, an old gentlemen who was sat on one of their tables near the pavement when we arrived (looked like he was waiting for someone), got up and walked inside to shout at someone, this guy had ordered a plain coffee actually before we had arrived so the staff had served us plus the Gujurat bunch with the cakes to go with their own flasks in front of this poor chap

55 minutes and our bill arrives, and how many cappucinos had they charged us for???

Come on Starbucks, India needs you!!!

Malc

jyotirmoy

Quite surprised to read ur experience... u haven't mentioned the name of the chain. I visit Barista, Costa Coffee, Cafe coffee day etc. in Delhi & never had to wait long for my order to be served. Probably at Ooty they had this supply problem... I was also wondering why did you go to this outlet to have cappucino when local great aromatic coffee is available at so many places... made in a jiffy right before your eyes?

Malkers

No I didnt mention the name but doesn't the title give it away somewhat? I'm well aware of all the great aromatic coffees available in most places but when its a place you don't know and you just want a coffee that you know then you tend to play it safe and go for a brand, I did have one other cappucino in the town whilst there and it was like manure but at least I tried eh

Malc

jyotirmoy

Some times the "safe" road has a diificult turn... but life is like that.. trying to decide most of the time & a straight plunge at times...

New-South-Welshman

You never hear the word 'no' from waiters in India. Except the time I was at Pizza Hut in Delhi and ordered pepperoni, and they said they didn't serve pork anymore. At least he told me, so. But I can understand your frustration.

Malkers

You're absolutely right, 'no' doesn't exist until it is always too late. Oh please don't make me recall my experience of trying to buy a pair of shoes in a UK size 11 in Woodlands (timberland ripoffs!)

greenchutney

malkers...i love your whinings and rants!

ooty is a hill station, a laid back town so ways of life are slower~ if you want the pace of it and quick service come to bombay~

no i dont want fourbucks, charbucks in ooty~ thats the last thing that place needs..more cookie cutter places to come up!

life is full of such moments...people should learn to laugh it if they can...~ frustration and anger at such things specially over some coffee stall will lead to hypertension and what not!

yes some people are genuinely incompetent, service is pathetic..no excuses for that..

unsolicited advice here above, tell me to do whatever..but its an open forum and your starbucks comment made me reply here~

Malkers

GC, I do believe you are just beginning to understand me! Yep these things frustrate the hell out of me at the time but I'm so glad they happen as they give me such great laughs to look back on and Jen simply rolls when she sees me ranting about stuff causing me to completely deflate. Hell if everything was perfect then how shite would that be!

I'm with you on the Starbucks issue too actually, I don't want to see any of those brands here to be honest but I know a franchise with Shoppers Stop in India is very close to a deal and I do believe that if some of the native brands don't buck their ideas up then the likes of Starbucks will slaughter them and take away all the young trendy software folk that don't mind paying a few extra rs to go somewhere trendy. I can guarantee that Starbucks won't accept that kind of service anywhere! It would be interesting to know what the service levels of CCD are like in Vienna and wherever else they have opened overseas, somebody check it out and report back please!

Yes I enjoy my rants, I could come on here all day with them but never get a thing done. I am seriously considering penning a book for the hell of it but it is so difficult to look funny and a little bit sarcastic without someone thinking I'm racist which I definitely am not, well unless you include the French & The Welsh of course

Malc

imhere0905

The funny thing is I don't go to Starbucks in Sydney but in Switzerland it is what I headed straight to, I knew what I was getting, might not have been the best but at least it was consistent. Barista was my favourite in India (though I did visit all coffee day and Costa) wherever I could find it I headed for it and just pretended I was back in Sydney, Australia when I needed a break, read the papers and relaxed.

beebah

I'm a big fan of the brownie/ice/cream/combo at barista so I eat the re once or twice a month and never have any problem but EVERY SINGLE CCD I've ever been (admittedly only about 5/6) to has the same staff to work ratio that Malkers is talking about.

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Food and other interesting things- a blog.

Sama

Hasn't being in India taught you patience, Malkers?

I told my husband that after being in India, I will never complain about slow service again in an American restaurant!

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MY INDIA, 2005-2008
"Once you have felt the Indian dust, you will never be free of it." (Rumer Godden, 1975)

greenchutney

malkers malkers..ofcourse i am with ya man~ remember i have been seeking advice from people in darjeeling (from the real estate thread) was it?

CCD and barista IMHO are positioning themselves for takeover or for sale~ they are making themselves attractive to potential suitors by opening as many branches as possible~ peets, fourbucks, gloria jean there are many that would like to come into the indian market~

quality sucks in so many barista and CCD branches that i can write stories about it..they are both losing money big time in many of their stores but they make some money being in some rich suburbs~ eitherways just prettying themselves up for an oversees investor...

a manager of barista here in one of the bombay suburbs told me that i should fix their wireless network..if i wanted wireless to work~ they advertised free wireless and it had been down for who knows how long but i was pretty surprised that he told me, the customer to fix it, the network if i wanted it...i had a good mind to hack at it

by the way..didnt realise this happened in a CCD...if it did..then please write to them about it...~ i thought it was some coffee stall or hotel raj or something random like that....!

PeakXV

Ahhhhhh India. There can be alot of muddles and confusions in the hospitality industry at times. It usually initiates itself with waiters/servers who are not fully educated and/or bilingual or trying to overly impress. For these types a healthy delay in service is far less a sin then using the word "No". In fact the word "yes" can have many meanings from "definitely not sir" to "wtf sir I'll try my best for you!". It's all about quickly translating the literal hinglish into the construed english.

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What lies behind us and what lies ahead of us are tiny matters compared to what lives within us.
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Don't go to India ~ Pre-trip Warnings & Misconceptions?

iwanttogoback

what stopped me in my tracks in a barista in ahmedabad was not the service or arcane pricing, but the toilets.

i'd been having a lovely time, studying, chatting, drinking coffee, just like at uni here and decided to go the toilet.

so, out of the western cafe, and straight into the indian toilet.

i laughed, but not till later.

rajjo_sg

In India, there no such thing as "service standards" for all kind of business. Here In india one have to shout and fight to get service for which he/she is paying.

Liviing in stone age.