Eve Teasing

Nick-H · Jul 25th, 2008, 23:23

There is more to this than is immediately apparent, and it has been discussed already in this, and/or other threads.

Things to consider before you do the instinctive whacking:

--- Can you explain to the people around, and the people who are about to gather, who didn't see events from the beginning, in their local language, why you are thumping one of their countrymen?

--- What will you do if twenty of his friends are just around the corner?

--- What will you do when he's arranged for twenty of his friends to arrive on their bikes before you've got a couple of streets away?

Tracy · Jul 25th, 2008, 23:53

This is a strange experience I had in 1998.
I visited the Jallianwala Bagh near to the Golden Temple Amritstar. As I was wondering around I became aware that I was being tailed by an Indian man in his 30's. Given the nature of the events that had happened there I had considered this place very sensitive regarding what the english had done there, and of course I being an english person I wanted to pay my respects to the victims of the massacre. Anyway I go to the museum he is still tailing me. I manage to shake him off and I prepare to look into the well where many of the victims died and it is there where this creep makes his move. He rushes me from behind and attempts to push himself onto me. I am so shocked by this I manage to get away from him and I run headlong into a sea of school children. They surround me and begin pulling at me touching my hair they seem not to have seen many white people. I stand there in stupifation really and shock. The creep has disappeared, and I spend the next hour having my photo taken with each of the children. It was a bizarre and unsettling experience. I felt unable to react. Beating him up in the place where there was a massacre would have been not looked on well.

capt_mahajan · Jul 26th, 2008, 00:03

Quote:

Beating him up in the place where there was a massacre would have been not looked on well.

Dunno. Seems very appropriate to me, doing the right thing in a place like that.

dhans · Jul 26th, 2008, 01:24

Yes, considering everything you would probably not be in India at all...

See also my post # 25.

Hans

cyhiraeth · Jul 26th, 2008, 02:42

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tracy

This is a strange experience I had in 1998.
I visited the Jallianwala Bagh near to the Golden Temple Amritstar. As I was wondering around I became aware that I was being tailed by an Indian man in his 30's. Given the nature of the events that had happened there I had considered this place very sensitive regarding what the english had done there, and of course I being an english person I wanted to pay my respects to the victims of the massacre. Anyway I go to the museum he is still tailing me. I manage to shake him off and I prepare to look into the well where many of the victims died and it is there where this creep makes his move. He rushes me from behind and attempts to push himself onto me. I am so shocked by this I manage to get away from him and I run headlong into a sea of school children. They surround me and begin pulling at me touching my hair they seem not to have seen many white people. I stand there in stupifation really and shock. The creep has disappeared, and I spend the next hour having my photo taken with each of the children. It was a bizarre and unsettling experience. I felt unable to react. Beating him up in the place where there was a massacre would have been not looked on well.

oh god. what a terrible situation!

wonderwomanusa · Jul 26th, 2008, 07:41

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sama

of course, I guess I'm safe since women over 40 are invisible anyway.....

That's what YOU think!

I was 60 during my last visit to India, and in Bangalore, walking down the steps of a restaurant after breakfast, some old guy who thought he was the gods' gift to women grabbed my butt and proceded to ask me to run away to Delhi with him. In English.

So I just said, sweetly, "I think some old man is asking the same of your daughter, isn't it?" and walked away.

pollock · Jul 26th, 2008, 08:25

Ladies don't be so condenscending -- Sometimes mutually innocent touching/exploring is good for your mind and body ;-)

In New Jack City where I live, there is a word for this thing done in trains... frottage is it?

Nick-H · Jul 26th, 2008, 15:25

pollock... are you sure you put the right letter at the beginning of your name?

If you want to talk crap about harrasment and abuse, please do it somewhere else.

puchoo · Jul 26th, 2008, 15:30

I second Nick, that comment is just not done!

monickam · Jul 26th, 2008, 15:45

Taking the left shoe off (if you're a right-hander) and slapping the offender in the face is the most acceptable way for an Indian woman to react to any serious form of eve-teasing. I guess the same method holds good for women tourists too.

Nick-H · Jul 26th, 2008, 16:06

I once heard an Italian woman, talking of the prudish British, say, "If men don't stare at us in the street, We worry that something is wrong!".

This is not a mutually flirtatious society. We are not talking about anything mutual at all, and certainly not anything that is even vaguely potentially pleasurable.

We are talking about stuff that leaves bruises.

dhans · Jul 26th, 2008, 16:12

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nick-H

"If men don't stare at us in the street, We worry that something is wrong!".

Not being stared at in India, then definitely something would b very wrong.

Hans

pollock · Jul 26th, 2008, 20:32

ofcourse, stalking, bruising and general one-sided pshysical/verbal inconvenience shouldn't be tolerated.

please note, I added the adjective *mutually* in my comment -- but was quite serious about the comment I made. probably the context was incorrect.

If people are not going to allow mutual interaction between consenting adults, I don't know what is going to come next.

Haylo · Jul 26th, 2008, 20:41

Quote:

Originally Posted by pollock

If people are not going to allow mutual interaction between consenting adults, I don't know what is going to come next.

I get the idea that you have missed the whole point of this thread...

Aishah · Jul 26th, 2008, 20:42

Quote:

Originally Posted by pollock

If people are not going to allow mutual interaction between consenting adults, I don't know what is going to come next.

The thread isn't about mutually consenting adults, pollock, it's about eve teasing.

Jul 25th, 2008, 23:23	#61
Nick-H Loud-mouthed, Noisy Bird Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Chennai, India Posts: 27,692	There is more to this than is immediately apparent, and it has been discussed already in this, and/or other threads. Things to consider before you do the instinctive whacking: --- Can you explain to the people around, and the people who are about to gather, who didn't see events from the beginning, in their local language, why you are thumping one of their countrymen? --- What will you do if twenty of his friends are just around the corner? --- What will you do when he's arranged for twenty of his friends to arrive on their bikes before you've got a couple of streets away? __________________ . Just one member of the IndiaMike Mod Team

Jul 26th, 2008, 01:24	#64
dhans Uru Buru member Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 1,564	Yes, considering everything you would probably not be in India at all... See also my post # 25. Hans __________________ Tips for trips to India with (young) children: India with kids Stories about our travels in India: Journal

Jul 26th, 2008, 15:30	#69
puchoo Forum Leader Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: New Delhi & Himachal Pradesh (Shimla) Posts: 4,082	I second Nick, that comment is just not done! __________________ Cheers! Sidharth Indiamike Mod team............the new kid on the block! puchoo.wordpress.com

Jul 26th, 2008, 15:45	#70
monickam Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Hyderabad Posts: 10	take off your shoes and slap him in the face Taking the left shoe off (if you're a right-hander) and slapping the offender in the face is the most acceptable way for an Indian woman to react to any serious form of eve-teasing. I guess the same method holds good for women tourists too.

Jul 26th, 2008, 20:32	#73
pollock Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: NYC Posts: 13	ofcourse, stalking, bruising and general one-sided pshysical/verbal inconvenience shouldn't be tolerated. please note, I added the adjective mutually in my comment -- but was quite serious about the comment I made. probably the context was incorrect. If people are not going to allow mutual interaction between consenting adults, I don't know what is going to come next. Last edited by pollock : Jul 26th, 2008 at 20:33. Reason: because

Jul 25th, 2008, 23:53	#62
Tracy Member Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Luton Posts: 12	This is a strange experience I had in 1998. I visited the Jallianwala Bagh near to the Golden Temple Amritstar. As I was wondering around I became aware that I was being tailed by an Indian man in his 30's. Given the nature of the events that had happened there I had considered this place very sensitive regarding what the english had done there, and of course I being an english person I wanted to pay my respects to the victims of the massacre. Anyway I go to the museum he is still tailing me. I manage to shake him off and I prepare to look into the well where many of the victims died and it is there where this creep makes his move. He rushes me from behind and attempts to push himself onto me. I am so shocked by this I manage to get away from him and I run headlong into a sea of school children. They surround me and begin pulling at me touching my hair they seem not to have seen many white people. I stand there in stupifation really and shock. The creep has disappeared, and I spend the next hour having my photo taken with each of the children. It was a bizarre and unsettling experience. I felt unable to react. Beating him up in the place where there was a massacre would have been not looked on well.

Jul 26th, 2008, 08:25	#67
pollock Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: NYC Posts: 13	Ladies don't be so condenscending -- Sometimes mutually innocent touching/exploring is good for your mind and body ;-) In New Jack City where I live, there is a word for this thing done in trains... frottage is it?

Jul 26th, 2008, 15:25	#68
Nick-H Loud-mouthed, Noisy Bird Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Chennai, India Posts: 27,692	pollock... are you sure you put the right letter at the beginning of your name? If you want to talk crap about harrasment and abuse, please do it somewhere else.

Jul 26th, 2008, 16:06	#71
Nick-H Loud-mouthed, Noisy Bird Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Chennai, India Posts: 27,692	I once heard an Italian woman, talking of the prudish British, say, "If men don't stare at us in the street, We worry that something is wrong!". This is not a mutually flirtatious society. We are not talking about anything mutual at all, and certainly not anything that is even vaguely potentially pleasurable. We are talking about stuff that leaves bruises.

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