this left hand, right hand business!

anar

i was brought up in india and although we were taught to eat with our right hands, it was never a huge issue if you used your left hand as well (at least that's how i remember it, growing up in a north indian family). in south india, i notice the practice is a lot stricter - i feel people looking when i use my left hand to eat (obviously when i am eating with my hands, something i enjoy doing from time to time, depending on what i'm eating). i practise good hygiene so it doesn't worry me, eating with my left hand. i cook with both my hands (as do most people, i guess) so where's the problem in eating with both?

in udaipur recently, a spanish friend thought it was the last straw when he handed the autorickshaw man the fare with his left hand and the man refused to accept it until it was proferred by his right hand! the driver's explanation, that this was his 'boni' (first earnings of the day) and to receive it from the left hand would cast an unhealthy shadow on the rest of his day, did not cut much ice with my friend who had been travelling in india for months and had had it upto his neck with all the 'mumbo-jumbo'! at the time, i had a go at him ('if you want it all to be 'just like at home' you should have stayed in spain!' or words to that effect) but later, upon reflection, i wondered how total novices to india react to these things. does it get to people as it did with my spanish friend?

another incident, albeit not strictly-related, comes to mind - during my partner's first trip to india (he's english), at crowded mumbai airport, his foot hit a man accidentally and there was such a fuss made by the recipient, a local non-english-speaker. i had learnt about this particular form of offence only after coming to live in mumbai years ago - it is not considered such a big 'no-no' in the north - that one is expected to touch the person whom you have thus offended (a light tap on the shoulder or some such inoffensive part of the body) and the harm is undone. it was hard work explaining all this to my partner at the time ('just touch the man, just touch the man!') who could not begin to understand how an accidental kick could give rise to such fury!

sirensongs

If you're going to have a ghost of a chance fitting in in India, or Asia in general, you have got to understand Feet.

This is a big stumbling block for most westerners. (ha ha, no pun intended)

Yesterday at the Dalai Lama's teachings I had to tell a Scot not to stick his feet toward the DL (we were sitting in plain view of the Big Guy). Every single Tibetan/Ladakhi had their feet tucked well under.

Another thing that really helped me was the "maph garnus" gesture (ducking head, hand on heart then on forehead) acknowledging you've gotten in the way somehow. A bodylanguage "excuse me" or "forgive me." Now it's automatic and the Tibetans I know think it's funny....;-)

The first customer of the day is special, too. You can use this to your advantage by levying for a discount ("first customer, good luck"). I noticed they sometimes kiss the money and put it up on the wall shrine. So the right hand thing is extra important.

Anyone noticed the "holding your right elbow with yr left hand" gesture in India? It's very common in Nepal for handing anything of significance to someone. Extra respect.

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"Why do people go to India to find themselves? India is where you go to lose yourself."
Feringhee: The India Diaries

capt_mahajan

Not really, though beggars do something which is close, sometimes.

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Outside the machine

GauhatiBoy

If I had to explain it to my American friends, I would say it's like a handshake (always done with the right hand here) but applies to more situations in Hindustan.

Prashant.M

Yup you've hit bulls eye, extra respect! This is especially done when offering something to God. It's known as naivaidya in Kannada (Karnataka). My guess is that, in some situations, offering something single-handedly is considered as arrogant, hence you show your humility by using both your hands.

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Happiness is just a thought away

capt_mahajan

Oops. Should have known.

My knowledge of temple practices is, fortunately, zero

Wanderer22

My feeling as well Capt..... Port and Starboard are the ones that are important.....


Wanderer22

brownboy66

you can add most of the South Pacific to that list as well. Polynesian cultures place a high degree of importance on making sure anything to do with the head (hats, food, etc), stays well away from the rest of the body - feet especially. Probably not quite as fervent as making sure your feet don't point at someone however. Another big no no is sitting on tables, or putting hats on tables and chairs. Again - the table is where you eat so keep your arse away from that one (makes sense if you think about it). Likewise with hats on chairs - if it sits on your head then don't put it in a place that's usually occupied by your arse!

Nick-H

holding right elbow with left hand: no, not outside the temple, where it is a basic part of some of the ritual movements for offerings, etc.

Get in the habit of giving, especially money, with your right hand only. It will keep people happy .

Even I learnt a new one recently: don't give money over the threshold. Either invite them in, or go out to them.

Remember that money is a god (lakshmi) and will be treated as such.

If you can't be doing with all this stuff then stick to Muslim, Christian, etc areas, business, etc!!!

federica

It's a really strange thing, especially as I came across different Indian students who never seemed to care for such things... These situations make me to ask "why should I do it if not all Indíans do it..."

GauhatiBoy

These Indian students were learning to follow your social norms, as I would if I visited another country.

robotvoice

what gets to me is when people react like your friend did. I think you hit the nail on the head with your response to him. In India I met a disturbingly large number of tourists from various countries who spent a lot of time complaining about India; the "superstitions", the endless temples, the trash, the touts, the traffic, etc. etc. And all I wanted to do was grab them by the neck and scream, "What are you doing here then?"

On further reflection I realized that it has nothing to do with India, these types of people surely spend their time complaining back in their home countries too.

Nick-H

The superstition... drives me mad. Can't do this on a Tuesday; can't do that on the 26th because that adds to eight.

Back "home"*... The bus lanes, the lack of parking, no public toilets.

*Actually, this is home now. I meant back in London.

robotvoice

Nick, you seem to have interpreted my post as an invitation to complain!
shees, some people...

Nick-H

Hey! You think I need an invitation?









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