Realistic info/advice for a solo female traveler?

sanamahorse

Hello all.

I am new here, but I am hoping to get a realistic picture of what to expect on my first solo trip to Inia this year. I have read in the guidebooks and from a few people on the Thorn Tree that sexual harrassment is a problem for solo female travelers, but I am wondering to what extent? It seems that half of the Thorn Tree posts are just there to get a reaction or for some other purpose other than to give useful info, so I hope I can get a better idea here! I can deal with stares and verbal advances, but how likely am I to get groped? How can I avoid it? I don't want to shut myself off from meeting people, but I also don't want to accidentally give off the wrong signals.

Thanks in advance for any replies!

katcalls

HI Sanamahorse

Welcome to IM. There have been numerous threads about this subject. If you do a search on "women travellers" you should come up with a goldmine of information.

Best regards
Kat

__________________
Bueller? Bueller?

shantibhavan

at the risk of being contradicted...realistically, sexual harrasment is not a problem! dress correctlly...legs and shoulders covered....don't make eye contact with men you don't know.......act demure....enjoy your stay

__________________
om shanti
karen
www.shantibhavanyoga.com

Pille

Don't worry - as the last post said, as long as you stay decently clothed and modest, things will be OK. I travelled solo in January and though there were some uncomfortable situations that can happen anywhere in the world (like when the ticket salesman in train tried to invite me to a "more quiet" place to discuss which seat do I want and started to ask personal issues while trying to touch my hand in the almost empty compartment), just be calm, careful and firm and you are as safe as you would be in other countries. As I moved down south from Goa I noticed a funny pattern - in trains when talking to locals people started to warn me as a solo female traveller about the next state I was heading into - "things will be much rougher out there, more traditions and more prejudices, more harrassment"... but in reality from Goa to Karnataka to Kerala to Tamil Nadu I just met more and more friendlier people on the way and also felt more safe (of course partly due to the fact that I was getting used to the surroundings).
Another issue that kind of surprised me as a woman from Europe was the fact that you will not get much advantages due to the fact that you are a woman the way I am quite used to at home (men opening the doors, offering a seat in a crowded trains or not pushing you backwards in the ticket queue). But that is OK

shantibhavan

good point! and not only won't you get womens priviledges you wont get treated as an equal either.....don't rise to the bait....always remember...you know the truth.

bijapuri

for firsthand experience, come to our local meetup in a week
see the thread called :

SF Bay area/ Northern Cal July Meet up???

C U there!

__________________
Focusing your life solely on making a buck shows a certain poverty of ambition. It asks too little of yourself. Because it's only when you hitch your wagon to something larger than yourself that you realize your true potential.
Barack Obama

lookit me!!!: http://www.flickr.com/photos/bijapuri/

Utube fuzzy logic:
http://youtube.com/profile_videos?user=bijapuri&p =r

somnath

Welcome to IM and India Sanamahorse . Catcalls is right that is the best way to get some info. Plz use Search option and try. Some links are given below it may give you some idea.

Just friends (really)...
last time: female attire?
Traveling alone. Any advice?
Too Young?
'Where is your husband??"

Cheers
Somnath

learningtofly

Hi sanamahorse,

U need not worry too much about any harassment provided u are decently clothed. Depending on ur travel plan, there wuld be certain places where u wuld need to be extra careful. But on the whole, places like Goa, Kerala, Rajasthan would not be a problem as tourism is very imp part of the lives of people there. They normally understand the sensitivity of such issues and how it wuld their business. Mumbai, u wuld have no problem. Delhi, u will have to be more careful.

Enjoy ur trip...

Cheers.

rangers

Carry a nice smile..with nice atitude..and you are on way of rediscovering..gear up..there is nothing like that fears in you.

LuAnnandJawahar

Though we would not expect you to have serious problems no matter where you are in India, we would suggest that females being hassled is MUCH more prevalent in tourist centers, as opposed to being less prevalent as suggested above. (We've never been to Kerala, but hear it is much more laid back than many tourist destinations.)

__________________
Reject violence.

lotus blossom

i travel solo; i've visited india 3x. the first time i took the advice of guide books that sternly warned against looking men in the eye, or something to that effect. So, i did not which was weird for me since it felt like I was shutting my eyes to half of india, or probably more since it seems it is predominately men that i see in the streets.

i forgot this "rule" the second time i went and my experience was so much different, and liberating. i generally smile at everyone i meet, male or female, and have made many indian male friends.

i second what rangers said.

__________________
Not all who wander are lost

crvlvr

Americans tend to smile and ackknowledge strangers. while this is considered polite in the US, in India (and many other countries) it will be considered strange and usually elicits the following mental response in the other party -- I don't even know you, you must want something from me.. Especially for women: its perfectly ok to ignore strangers. Any kind of acknowledgement might be misconstrued as an invitation.

pandrea82

sanamahorse, when are you going to india? i'm going in october or november this year for the first time. where are you going?

GoanCanuck

I agree. Very dangerous for a woman to give such an impression in places like UP and Bihar.

asucka

I have travelled as a solo female last summer for 4 weeks. So now I will try to summarize my impressions for you. O.K. it seems that the chances of something really bad happening to you in India (like being raped) are not bigger (or might even be smaller) than in most western countries. Of course, if you abide to general rules like dressing and avioiding night lone walks in some palces.

However, India was really a first place in the world where I felt that being a woman is very different. It seemed that a solo female on the road is percieved by indians the same way you would react at, say, a 7 year old child alone at the train station. Each time I would get to the station many men would gather around me, asked where is my company. When they found out I had no partner they would get shoked and ususally start trying to help me get tickets, by tea etc. as if I was unable to do it myself. It also included numerous invitations for dinner, home visit, etc. that were of clearly sexual nature and had to be declined.

The most awful situations happened to me on trains. Once some officials would notlet me on trying to convince me that something was wrong with my ticket (even though I was on their passenger's list). So they only let be board a train after I promised to sit with one of them at night in the separate compartment "to have a coulpe sigarettes". But he was not offensive and after I firmly declined all his moves we just smoked and I went to sleep.

Another situation was also on a train when I a guy was jerking off at me for several hours and did not stop even after I screamed at him. Yuki!

But in general it was all very unpleasant but not dangerous. The bad thing is being unable to speak to local males because almost every conversation would lead to sex advances. What a relief it was, though, to get to the women's waiting room and feel so safe and cozy there with other women who were so nice.