Indians returning from abroad

rohan5577

hello everyone,

Just wanted some ideas/ experiences of people who have returned to India after having lived or worked abroad.

Well I have not been out of India for a very long time just over 2 years but these 2 years have definately changed me somewhat; except for my core that remains totally "hindustani" and "desi" as they call here.

I just have an outsider's view and question some things about India and they way we grow up to do things and our mind gets so conditioned to the Indian way of life that we fail to see a better way of life for everyone. We just grow to care about our families and friends forgetting that life is larger and we need to give back what we get form the country.

What I am happy to see is that there are people who see this now and are making their contribution to the country. I am also happy to see that people from the other parts of the world are now in fact giving up their pre-conceived notions about us.

I feel we have a long way to go, to give up old schools of thought where required and to make this changed perspective a sustained and collaborative effort. We need to take care of our environment.

My greatest fear: Delhi and the sub-urbs not having sufficient water supplies!

Once I was asked in Denmark very politely though if we still used bullock carts as the everyday means of transport--in 2001--and that's not an exaggeration.

People often ask me and will ask me why would I want to return to India after being in Canada or the Western world and having the chance to live here?

My answer is in fact a return question most of the times: Why would I not want to return to India?

Just some random thoughts that i penned down. Open to brickbats, bouqets whatever

Rohan

__________________
You can take a man out of India, but you can never take India out of a man!

tukat

I am not Indian, but maried to an Indian, he hs been out of India for about 17 yrs., 3 in Paris, 13 in USA. When he visits india he has mixed feelings, so happy to be home, so irritated by infrastructure problems.

When I was in college in Massachusetts, I was close friends with some women students from India, (in fact that is hoew I met my husband) one day at lunch a freshman from the midwest actually asked them if people had telephones in India? And did elephants & tigers roam the streets?
Needless to say, the Indians set her straight!

Good luck with your readjustment to India.

lobo

Some people still think in england we always carry umbrellas and drink tea all the time

sillylilly

Rohan,

This is my PERSONAL experience - after living in USA for almost 12 years (I left India at 21), I have been back in India for the past 7 months. I am glad I spent my young adult years in USA because as a woman I let go of so many pre conceived notions I had about how a woman ought to be. I went to grad school, worked for several years, got my greencard, etc. and so USA made me independent. However, after living there for 12 years, I always missed my family and truth be told, I got incredibly bored of my routine life there. In a weird way, I missed the chaos and noise and even the dust, and well..the cows and monkeys. In my 7 months since I've been back, the only things I truly miss are my car (mostly the ability to get in and drive a 100 miles if I felt like it) and the awesome book stores there. Living in Bangalore, I find life here to be as routine as in USA at times. If you have money, you can get everything here.

The other thing is that till Sept 11, nobody ever questioned me in USA as to my citizenship or even treated me as a foreigner. Something changed that day and as a brown young Indian woman, the not-so-random checks in the airport got old, the weird looks given to me soon after Sept. 11, the shouting of "dot-head", etc. got to me (especially because I never used the bindi). Also, as a techie, the constant threat of layoffs (I survived 14 rounds in 6 years) and the bleak job situation made to strongly think about coming back to India. This is where the action is these days anyway.

Anyway, once in a while I feel I may have made a mistake but that's mostly because I am getting used to living with lots of people in the house again (my husband, my in-laws, my parents, etc.) and the associated tensions. So far, its been okay. We'll see how it goes

The best thing about living in Bangalore (especially Jayanager) - the TOTALLY AWESOME FOOD! Man, onion rava masala dosa RULES!

tukat

You mean you don't? What about Marry Poppins? Is she a myth too? I'm devastated!

I have a good friend here in the states from the UK, she sure has a "stiff upper lip", she fell down & broke her elbow during a hiking trip and acted like it was nothing, just a little bump, we had to force her to go to hospital!

Even though I have the same birthday and nationality as George W. Bush & even went to some of the same schools, I am nothing like him, voted against him, think he has pernamently ruined what little good reputation USA ever had.
I also am not fat, don't eat fast food, drink coke, watch or talk trash or sports, nor am i loud and pushy, but I do speak with an American accent.

Apparently some USA travelers like to pretend they are Canadians when they travel. they get Canadian flag t-shirts & little stickers for their luggage!
I hear the real Canadians don't like it one bit!

lobo

In a weird way, I missed the chaos and noise and even the dust, and well..the cows and monkeys.

That is not weird I was in india 2 months as a traveller and I miss that as well.
Its seems sort of....right to have cows, monkeys etc etc all walking around sharing the same place.

Shaktipalooza

Nice post sillylilly,

We're still trying to figure out what life would be like if we moved back to India. Well, Mrs would be moving back, I was born and raised in the US. We'll be in the Bangalore area next month thinking about the possibilities.

skell

A good friend of mine is a guy from Chennai, single, smart, very nice. He doesn't want to go back mainly because of the pressure his parents put on him when he visits. He has a lot of female friends and really enjoys their company and the freedom to just hang out with women. Also (I could be a bit biased), this is a very nice place to live!

Digital Drifter

Exactly! it's a thing, a habit, a feature, a song which you yearn why people,inspite of all the comforts, still want to go back. In spite of being a very nice place to be.

I've been to different countries either for a short time or for extended periods but everytime I go within 3 weeks, I feel like a passenger in a taxi watching the sights go by. In spite of all the pubs, libraries, musuems and malls. don't know but the moment I get home

'mom, can you make some masala dosa & chutney?'

I was asked a couple of times whether I'd like to stay in USA & every time I said no, they couldn't figure out why. IT was not patriotism or any jingoistic sentiment but something unexplainable. I still can't explain why, it's a wierd feeling knowing what you're going back to is /not/ par for the course but you still want to.

fcuk, I should start my /own/ religion now in the way I'm meandering.

rohan5577

Some interesting thoughts here especially sillylilly and "memsahib"--> i like that.

Well I am 26 yrs old, left India for the first time when I was 21 and that was my first job and my first time out of India. As the average Indian I was shy, reserved , extremely polite and made a a conscious attempt to be politically and socially correct. But that was Europe.

Now that I am 26, been in Canada since 24 and more-so worldy wise, I just see no diffrence in the way I am going to live my life once I go back. In fact "quality of life" is what you define for yourself and thats all where it stops.

Sillylilly you are so right about the family aspect, I often get into an arguement with my mom over trivial issues--issues that are now so non-consequential for me like overwhelming the guests, being socially acceptable in all that you do; and all that you don't, nosy neighbours, relatives and the jing-bang.

When I returned to India, for the first tiime in Summer '04, my mom was cool with the idea of me living in with a "white female" , but I felt that people wanted to say something to me but they would dare not confront me.

My grandma told me:do what you want as long as you are out there but don't get anything home , if you know what I mean.

My family is not so orthodox in its thinking but in my opinion the problem arises when Indians try to be socially correct ( at least in thier thinking) all the time.

I am in for a hard time for a few things when I get back but am prepared. Will see how it goes, it will be interesting to keep this thread going and hear what everyone thinks including the non-indians, returning indians, indians and whoever

Rohan

snowcrab

off topic but short

Some Canadians find it sort of flattering that Americans put Canadian flags on their stuff, they started doing it during the Vietnam era. The joke that raced across Canada after the Bush election was "Canadians are not proud to be Canadians, we are just relieved not to be Americans". My condolences, and if you know anyone who needs santuary,many private citizens are lobbying the government to find ways to give selected Americans (you know who) refugee status if they need it.

rohan5577

I had no idea that there are so many proud Canadians on here.

And I agree canada is so multicutural its the world in one couuntry but its COLD to the extreme !!!! right now its -32 including the windchill!!!

indiadreamn

Indeed. Boo to the horrible weather we're having today.


I'm interested to hear about you're experiences once you move back. When are you going or are you already there and I missed it?

rohan5577

I am leaving on 28th Jan, bbye Ottawa

indiadreamn

well, at least you'll miss what is supposed to be a really damn cold febuary! Farewell!