How to deal with Arrogant Newbies

this one i guess: Want an estimated price for my travel

Steven, at least in this case, I must say it seemed rude enough to me, and I'm an Indian. I might have even ignored the 'first' post where information was demanded instead of being requested, but the subsequent posts ridiculing people's suggestions & responses was a bit too much to accept. If this is what is seen as an average 'Indian' interaction, then I think the expectations/standards have gone too low...

This is a commercial site with lots of adverts. Accordingly, some newbies may think that there are paid employees on shift & trained to answer/pamper travelers as to their detailed itinerary requests. Some people may well be used to servants/agents/advisers to handle the majority of their daily tasks.

So shall we agree amongst ourselves what sort of fee we should charge such people?

I'm cheap - I'll settle for an ice cold Kingfisher or a couple of swigs from a fifth of Old Monk.

Whilst the OP undoubtably BECAME rude I think his initial question was not out of order in any way..Just plain and forthright and ended with a please...
Did he deserve the wagging fingers I don't think so..

We see here a example of what I talked about in "ownership issues" one member makes a IMHO a unfounded remark about the original post and then others join in to ridicule the guy, he reacts...Result thread closed, that could have easily been avoided.

We have a very able mod team WHO'S job it IS to decide what flies and what doesn't, do we really need the vigilantes?
I know it's not done out of malice but if we are saying here newbies need to learn etiquette then isn't it also the case that older members who presumably KNOW the etiquette here on IM should also show some restraint....

I'm not any more tolerant than the next guy but his first post was innocent if a little forthright, he didn't deserve the lecture on what flies, do I need to point out that these posters are only individuals and don't speak for IM...Some here knew the answers to his question and were willing to share..Left at that the thread could easily have had another outcome....

Food for thought

Something else we don't agree on

Your disagreeing with me Dave HOW DARE YOU!!!!

Seriously you want to see how this kind of groupism can ruin a forum...Take a look at The Thorn Tree and TA...

It started out the same way, a few posters thinking longevity allowed them to question the motives, character and travel savvy of newbie posters...
Others jumped to further inflame the situation, some newbies fought back (human nature I'm afraid) slanging match. With those longer in the tooth members convinced they were right cause they are the "core group"

It didn't take long for chaos to ensue and the TT especially suffered, from the bad taste that started to leave in new posters mouth..

Nothing like that level of abuse here on IM but the fact we now have a thread discussing if it's alright to flame new posters if construed as arrogant should ring alarm bells.

It's nice to be nice they say

@Klompen - exactly my thoughts when I read the first post. But the guy went off the handle afterwards - whether caused by the first reply or not cannot be established with certainty. Wish all of us could be polite, patient and tolerant but till that happens, let us not drive away newbies - in relative terms the onus is more on longer standing members rather than a new person.

@Steven Ber - even if your intent wasn't to do that, there was definite bashing of Indian mannerisms there. As that is freely allowed on this forum, cannot complain, but it does feel a little bad when generalisations are made (as it applies to all Indians). If I could request slight couching of general criticism with words like "in many cases" - "being culturally different" etc .

When I read the original post I assumed that Rourkela was somewhere in outback Australia and that the OP's natural method of communication would be by trading insults. Courtesy of Wiki I now understand that it is in Orissa.

I still think that his response to Nattusbs was totally out of order.

I am not cheap. Old or newbie who are arrogant, 1 British pound for my one word. And I will give 0,1% for charity in India.

Different questions irk different people in different ways. I can't imagine that a simple 'how might I get to a rooster fight' request would get closed down. Yet it did. We all have different values, codes of conduct .... & ultimately traveling needs. Let's all walk a cyber mile in each others chappals first - before pouncing onto backs.

Dave maybe because I've live abroad a long long time I'm not offended/confused by badly constructed English which was all it was in the first place, had other posters taken that on board there might not have been to mini flame war..When people employ a derogatory tone others OFTEN react..Forum dweller 101 I'm afraid.

He listed his wishes and added a please, it was up to us to decide whether to help or not lectures on his presentation of the question maybe pissed him off, when he thought he had constructed a perfectly ok question in his probably second language...
You see exasperating examples of this all the time, Brits with really really thick accents getting irate with Indians who can't understand them.. They don't realise they are doing anything wrong because that's how they speak, right, lessons learnt over the years.

You're opening gambit in a thread conversation often shapes the development of the thread, in this WE ALL have responsibilities in being polite applying some degree of understanding to the thrust of the post and showing restraint in our replies.

If we decide not bring in newbie's or Indians, even though the titles is about arrogant newbies, we can move forward with this discussion!
Generalization and group-ism only digresses, misleads, and encourages racially discriminatory perceptions!


(One can always turn to Gandhi , when in need of a value based response in any given situation)

One definite way to encourage courteousness and politeness is :
Mahatma Gandhi: 'Be the change that you wish to see in the world.'

DaveW

Thanks for the support.

Now, isn't that how it should be - to acknowledge with a thanks - happens rarely among Indians - I am not saying it does not on IM - but, rarely.

Yes, there have been times when I have done this, not intentional by any means. I try to do so to the best of my ability.

The OP came across in his first post as "demanding" - period. He could have asked the same question politely as in seeking help to his dilemma. This should have been the approach on any forum, in person, on the internet, by e-mail - whatever.

Cheers

Nattusbs