Hating Delhi!!!

reddragon

Hi all
I arrived in Delhi yesterday and I have to say I hate it!! I really want nothing more than to get out of here, and horrible thoughts of returning home have crept into my mind . I thought that I could handle it, by Thailand is nothing compared to this!! I am in Paharganj. Did I pick the worst place to come?? I have walked up the main bazar twice and seen a handful of non indian people!! I have not ventured out to explore as I have been harrased and stalked !!! I am such an easy going person and I'm too nice. I'm finding it really hard to adjust to this!!! I think this is why I am having such a hard time. An I going to hate the rest of India!!!
Are there any low stress places to hang out around here???

rockyS

Hi am sorry that u feel so low and that ur having a bad experience in Delhi ,from what i can gather Paharganj area is where most foreigners stay ,dont have much idea abt that place , thou would suggest that u look for an alternative place for accomodation ,overall its not as bad ,as u may have experienced .Its best to ignore the ppl who r harrasing you.Am sure ur travelling to other places in India like Rajatshan, goa and the south , u will have a great time in all this places.maybe u shuld look for a travel partner, to make things easier on u.

reddragon

Thanks Rockys,
I am going to Rajatshan. I guess that I just wanted someone to tell me that it gets better, not worse.
The place I'm staying isn't bad and the people there are really nice! so no probs there!! I might just try and get out of delhi earlier. I'm not so normally bummed about things, maybe I'm just tired!!!

Raven

hey...
don't feel so low...everything is gonna be fine....i think RockyS i s rite most of the foreigners stay in paharganj...but it is very conjusted ...and people are not that nice but i don't think they will harrass u ...if they do then give them what they deserve...
and bout india well i'm pretty sure that after some time u will fall in love with india...itz just bout timing... and visiting india...well manali,dharamshala,goa,kerala, hampi...ohhh there is so many places to visit...
and in delhi ..try to visit CP,janpath ,Sarjoini nagar market....
for drinking and smoking u have paharganj....
but i think from paharganj don't buy any stuff coz they give really shitty stuff/////
try to go gurgaon..there u get gud stuff.....
otherwise visit manali and goa...the DIVINE PLACE.
anywayz u need any let me know...
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I LET MY MIND TO WANDER BUT IT NEVER CAME BACK./......

Alan D

hi reddragon!

Paharganj can be a bit too much for first time visitors. All these people want to do business, and they can probably sense from your body language that you're new to India.

Don't stay in your room, take a deep breath and get right into the middle of it. Even if you don't feel that confident, put on a show and don't let anyone hassle you. You sound as if you're on your own, so go to one of the many eating places where travellers hang out and just talk with people.

Most people want to talk but I've noticed in places like Paharganj there's also a fear of not being "cool". I'm sure in no time at all you will make friends.

So, come on, pull yourself together, and get into it! I can assure you that in a couple of weeks time you'll wonder why you ever thought about going home

williaam

My first week or so in India was not at all what I had expected, I nearly hated it. I too was tired of being harassed and having to be guarded nearly all the time. Things did eventually change for me. It wasn't Delhi that was a problem it was more that nothing around me was familiar and it was easy forget who I was, where I came from, etc. It is so easy to get lost (mentally) when you are thrown into such a different environment. Granted I think this is part of India's appeal but I think some of us have a harder time adjusting. Nonetheless, it wasn't until I met some other travellers that I was able to feel more comfortable. Maybe, thats wrong but it it really did help to talk to other people who were sharing your concerns and problems and helped you feel not so lonely. So my point is, go out and meet some other travellers, be assertive, be outgoing do whatever you can to try and enjoy yourself, but also don't be discouraged if you don't like it. A lot of people have an amazing and enjoyable times in India and it often builds expectations. I thought I would travel to India and never want to leave, but my experience was just the opposite. But no matter how much I didn't like it, I am so gald that I went and wouldn't have wanetd to go anywhere else had I known what my experience would be like. Ok, now I am rambling. Hope things look up for you soon.

mercedes10

Hey! Really sad to hear you're not enjoying Delhi. I must admit when I first visited India I expected to not like Delhi, but actually I loved it from the moment I arrived. I'm sure you'll grow to love it too! You'll need to get used to people trying to talk to you and sell you stuff though. Just ignore them and keep walking. The word 'bas' (pronounced bus) can also be helpful - it means 'enough!'.

If you want to go somewhere chilled out in Delhi I'd suggest Dilli Haat. It's an outdoor shopping & eating place - everything is fixed price, no-one hassles you and it generally has a lovely laid-back atmosphere about it. We also got talking to some really nice locals in one of the cafes. You pay about 10R to get in so it stops the touts & beggars going in. For quiet time I think it's ideal. There are loads of lovely stalls selling handicrafts from across India and lots of cafes with numerous varieties of food to choose from. You can easily browse without hassle and sit and have a drink. Or what about heading towards New Delhi - visit India Gate and Gandhi's memorial. Both are big, clean, grassy, open spaces and you might find them relaxing.

Alternatively, maybe you should just throw yourself into the chaos of India! I recommend taking a cycle rickshaw through Old Delhi. It's crazy but awesome! Don's miss the spice market, the Sikh Gurdwara and Jain Temple. Actually, for a bit of relaxation you could do worse than sitting in the Gurdwaras. I found the people there lovely & friendly and could easily have sat for hours in the calm interior listening to the music and readings. They also have community kitchens where you can have a free meal with lost of locals & foreigners alike. The Hindu temples are nice places to spend some time too!

ENJOY!!!

williaam

I have to agree with Mercedes about the rickshaw through Old Delhi, this was one of our favorite parts of our trip. Don't miss the opportunity.

Alan D

Have you been to Connaught Place yet? It's only about a 20 -25 rupee auto rickshaw ride from Paharganj or you can walk there in 20 minutes.

Try the United Coffee House in CP. It's a comfortable relaxed place for a beer, coffee or a bite to eat and a great contrast to neo-apocalyptic Paharganj.

jay_m_222

I think after a few days you will embrace the chaos, confusion and block out the people that are bothering you. I found New Dehli to be a great experience and alot of fun. I also agree w/ Mercedes 100%

I think people immediately lock in on what bothers them or frustrates them about their surroundings as opposed to soaking it in and adapting. I am sure you will love India and when you go back home think about New Dehli and smile

other good words to get people to move on:

jao - go
jahiye - please go
nahi - no
ji-nahi - no for older person

machadinha

What got me very confused at first is that I would normally say to a beggar or peddler or whatever "No thank you, I don't need that", interact with them in short. Hard as it is you have to learn not to do that as to them any interaction is a sign of hope. You just have to completely ignore them even if it makes you feel like a complete neocolonial bastard.

One thing about Delhi or at least Paharganj and Connaught Place areas, unlike most other places it doesn't really matter whether you ignore them or not, they'll still be after you. This is hard on a first-time visitor yes. Like others said, take a stroll to Old Delhi for instance where the atmosphere is very different -- still hectic but people won't be all over you.

Other than that just take a train to Pushkar (well to Ajmer and then a bus, Ajmer is nice to hang out in for a day or two which few foreigners do) or some such place, it may be touristy but it's mellow and will help you to acquire "the feel". Explore Delhi when you return for your flight home, it's a wonderful city but you probably wouldn't appreciate it coming in.

Good luck and don't leave just yet, I hated India for 3 days then I just loved it.

(Hey folks all of you who have been wondering who's this Machadinha barging in here with all his ten-year-old advice? What brought me here was looking for tsunami relief volunteer opportunities actually. It now seems I've hooked up with a worthwhile-looking group in Thailand so who knows if I don't make it over there, will take me a while anyway so you're not rid of me yet. I'll keep you posted no doubt. Had a very touching phone call with some Thai guy just today. Anyway I've found this a very friendly and helpful group, quite exceptional, and if anything it's helped me to give me some focus about returning to Asia. Cheers there + I hope I haven't had too big of a mouth myself.)

nliedel

But I have traveled in some very different cultures with some very pushy people. I think that you are just experiencing culture shock. Sometimes a new culture can be overwhelming and seem incredibly foriegn and frightening. What is not meant as a sign of aggression can be interpreted that way. Just hange tough, get out, take it in half horu incriments, and keep trying.. You will like it more and it will get better. You may even look back and laugh at this someday.

skell

The best thing I found to do in difficult situations is to smile at people - even (or especially) when you least feel like it. Almost always, in India at least, they will smile back and it's an instant uplifting of your spirits.

markhyd

yeah i always say in India, if you go into a situation smiling, you'll come out of it smiling.

soulfood

Paharganj is definitely not the best place for a first timer. I've recommended people against it before. But as others have said, rest of India is going to be much better than this.

Low stress places? I recommend South Delhi. You won't be heckled by beggers there. Consider moving there unless you're leaving Delhi in a day or two. There was a good recommendation of a guest house in the same thread I mentioned above.

Finally, if you're getting really stressed and feel like you need to unwind get a taxi or an auto to The Lotus Temple. It's not a temple in the traditional sense. More of a peaceful scenic spot and a grand architectural wonder. They call it Taj Mahal of the 20th century. It's the most peaceful place you'll find in Delhi.