A Diplomat's Guide To India

TimMakins

Ever wondered what the diplomats are told when they come to India ? Here's a fascinating website from the USA that explains all you want to know, and then some.

http://foia.state.gov/MMS/postrpt/pr...asp?CntryID=69

Its a very long page, so to save you reading it all, here are a few of the better bits of advice:


Travelers by train should hold on to their luggage until the train has left the station.

Culture shock can cause insomnia, headaches, irritability, and a variety of other symptoms.

The best opportunity to meet Indians is at a reception or dinner party.

Use of condoms and avoidance of high-risk behaviors are encouraged.

An occasional cow meanders down avenues, reminding visitors that this is India.

Western men should avoid going shirtless.

Visitors to India should always be aware of their surroundings.

Groups intending to demonstrate against the Embassy are required to apply for a permit 48 hours in advance.

Normal housekeeping is complicated by pollution

It is occasionally difficult to insert the wide prong of U.S. plugs into Indian-made stepdown transformers.

Indians are hospitable people and friendships develop rapidly.

Vehicles painted olive green in color are not acceptable for registration by local authorities.

Shopping in Mumbai is interesting.

Pianos are scarce.

Sequined clothes are comparatively inexpensive on the local market.

Gentle persistence on issues of importance to you yields dividends.

The English language is used in ways that may perplex Americans.

Shoes wear out more quickly in this climate.

Because most Americans in Chennai entertain primarily at teas, luncheons, cocktail parties and dinners, a good supply of table linens, dishes, glassware and flatware is necessary.

If someone volunteers to be photographed in their ethnic outfit or with their elephant or cobra, be prepared to pay a tip—this is their livelihood.

Avoid contact with stray or wild animals, especially those exhibiting unusual behavior, foaming at the mouth, or attempting unprovoked attacks.

Note that most locally made metal pots are not designed to withstand the temperatures of U.S. ovens and ranges.

Kelloggs is producing good-quality breakfast cereals.

Servants can be a significant asset—most people hire at least one.

Laws in the southern states make the sport of hunting almost impossible.

Transiting Mumbai is not recommended.

Indian toys are not durable and varied.

and here's my favourite one of all:

The designated R&R point for India is London.

Tim in Ireland

__________________
Travelling Tim - http://www.mapability.com/blogs/ My images at Lonely Planet - http://tinyurl.com/yk43ams

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."

Mark Twain

PeakXV

My favourite bit of wisdom came on my first trip to India (Toronto - London hop), from an old Britisher seated next to me who had served there during the Raj and who had obviously suffered from the Gandhi non-cooperation campaign. As he sipped his G&T and took a puff of his cigar he quipped " ah yes Indians ... incredibly intelligent people but impossible to get them to do anything"

__________________
What lies behind us and what lies ahead of us are tiny matters compared to what lives within us.
~ Oliver Wendell Holmes

Don't go to India ~ Pre-trip Warnings & Misconceptions?

Merchant

Since nearly all of Bush's appointees are political (as opposed to career civil servants in the diplomatic corps), those oil men, bankers, and Christian wackos need all the help they can get. Let them wilt in the malarial heat for want of a decent piano.

mca2005

Unfortunately for America this has been going on for years on both sides of the fence - remember a kenndy had to quietly recalled from Ireland - she had absolutely no business being a diplomat in the first place...

anyway my fav was this:
"Avoid contact with stray or wild animals, especially those exhibiting unusual behavior, foaming at the mouth, or attempting unprovoked attacks."

good advice for humans too

skell

"The English language is used in ways that may perplex Americans."

Yes, it is very much perplexing and bamboozlement!

Merchant

Yes, it is very much of perplexing and bamboozlement please, sir.

beach

'Really', said an Indian


BTW why should the diplomats come in 'contacts' with wild animals, especially those exhibiting unusual...

himadventures

I am a INIDAN and above wrriten piece is crap...you all know who had been to INDIA that some lines are just FUN to read.
I think-INDIA is a great country with it's magic and multi-dimension faces.
You can not escape from INDIA without noticing that there is GOD who runs this universe.
Now take this line in any means !!

sirensongs

This (above post) is a joke, right?

__________________
"Why do people go to India to find themselves? India is where you go to lose yourself."
Feringhee: The India Diaries

skell

Himadventures - your English has very much peplexed this American!!

navinkurian2002

humm interesting the way word's can mean different thing's to different people. hehe

__________________
It doesn't interest me what you do for a living.
I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare dream of meeting your heart's longing.

himadventures

Yes- I typed those words in a running car and in freezing temp. of north India.
Do forgive me for spelling errors...but what I wanted to say...you missed that.
INDIA is really being run by GOD-I think we can have a new topic on this.
When I say this...just pause and see around you and you will feel what I am saying.