Teenagers - public displays of affection?

#1 Dec 26th, 2012, 23:30
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  • BranCorgi is offline
#1
So, what is acceptable for teenagers in Bangalore, in terms of public displays of affection? Is holding hands ok? Walking arm-in-arm? Does it make a difference if they are out on the street versus in a mall?

My daughter (17) has been in India since August, and we will be visiting in February and bringing her boyfriend (18) with us. They both look quite young (at best, about 16), and are both clearly foreigners (very fair and blond). I know that neither of them will want to attract any unpleasant attention, but I think it will be very hard for them to not at least hold hands after so many months apart.

I've read the various postings about public displays of affection, and it was suggested that there might be more leeway for teenagers? Is it important that they not be out alone together, but that I should always be around as "chaperone"?

Thank you for any advice you can give. They would never kiss in public even here in the US, so I'm not worried they would do anything more than a hug, or holding hands, or walking arm in arm, but I realize that the standards are VERY different in India.
#2 Dec 27th, 2012, 00:03
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I would venture to guess holding hands in Bangalore out in public is no big deal. Kissing will draw attention. Since you are sure that wont happen, they should be fine.
#3 Dec 27th, 2012, 00:15
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Under normal circumstances, holding hands shouldn't be a problem, but times aren't normal at the moment.

The recent gang rape in Delhi has caused protests all over India, and these protests are unusual, and seem to be lasting a long time, if they continue, there's a chance that youngsters in bigger cities may feel they can be a little more open in public, perhaps as a form of protest, and if this does happen, it's only a matter of time before there's a backlash against those people, and Karnataka has it's fair share of idiots who're against any form of public affection, though their 'affirmative action' has been largely in coastal Karnataka.

This is only the opinion of 1 foreign tourist, but you do need to keep your eye on the news.
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#4 Dec 27th, 2012, 00:37
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#4
Quote:
Originally Posted by BranCorgi View Post So, what is acceptable for teenagers in Bangalore, in terms of public displays of affection? Is holding hands ok? Walking arm-in-arm? Does it make a difference if they are out on the street versus in a mall?

My daughter (17) has been in India since August, and we will be visiting in February and bringing her boyfriend (18) with us. They both look quite young (at best, about 16), and are both clearly foreigners (very fair and blond). I know that neither of them will want to attract any unpleasant attention, but I think it will be very hard for them to not at least hold hands after so many months apart.

I've read the various postings about public displays of affection, and it was suggested that there might be more leeway for teenagers? Is it important that they not be out alone together, but that I should always be around as "chaperone"?

Thank you for any advice you can give. They would never kiss in public even here in the US, so I'm not worried they would do anything more than a hug, or holding hands, or walking arm in arm, but I realize that the standards are VERY different in India.
As someone who lives in Bangalore, I'd say it shouldn't be much of a problem. Assuming you're staying/visiting the touristy/commercial parts of the city, it should be even less problematic. There are some areas in the city where I wouldn't recommend doing that, but I highly doubt you'd be going there.
#5 Dec 27th, 2012, 02:29
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Thank you, aloke_m. Perhaps you should warn me about the areas you wouldn't recommend? And if you have any suggestions of things we should do in Bangalore, please make recommendations! Including if there are some daytrips outside of Bangalore we should consider? We will be there for about a week (my husband is there for business), and have never been to India before. Normally, my idea of travelling isn't to stay in big cities all the time, but in this case, the only purpose of the trip is business and visiting my daughter, so our destination has not been chosen for the sightseeing available. But I'd love to experience as much of India as we can while staying in Bangalore.
#6 Dec 27th, 2012, 09:16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BranCorgi View Post ... any suggestions of things we should do in Bangalore, please make recommendations! Including if there are some daytrips outside of Bangalore we should consider?
http://www.karnatakatourism.org/Bangalore/en/

Quote:
Things to do
http://www.karnatakatourism.org/Transport/en/11
#7 Dec 27th, 2012, 09:48
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BranCorgi View Post Thank you, aloke_m. Perhaps you should warn me about the areas you wouldn't recommend? And if you have any suggestions of things we should do in Bangalore, please make recommendations! Including if there are some daytrips outside of Bangalore we should consider? We will be there for about a week (my husband is there for business), and have never been to India before. Normally, my idea of travelling isn't to stay in big cities all the time, but in this case, the only purpose of the trip is business and visiting my daughter, so our destination has not been chosen for the sightseeing available. But I'd love to experience as much of India as we can while staying in Bangalore.
an excursion to nandi hills would be a good idea - combine nature with history (tipu sultan's fort at the top affords amazing views of the countryside). go in the morning, back by late afternoon.

further but very interesting is a trip to mysore (mysore palace, the zoo, flower market) and srirangapatnam (the confluence of three rivers, tipu sultan monuments). this would take a whole day if you go by car. there's a new road now which cuts the time taken to reach mysore to a couple of hours at most.
#8 Dec 27th, 2012, 09:49
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You could spend 3-4 days in Hampi.
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#9 Dec 27th, 2012, 20:58
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Originally Posted by BranCorgi View Post Thank you, aloke_m. Perhaps you should warn me about the areas you wouldn't recommend? And if you have any suggestions of things we should do in Bangalore, please make recommendations! Including if there are some daytrips outside of Bangalore we should consider? We will be there for about a week (my husband is there for business), and have never been to India before. Normally, my idea of travelling isn't to stay in big cities all the time, but in this case, the only purpose of the trip is business and visiting my daughter, so our destination has not been chosen for the sightseeing available. But I'd love to experience as much of India as we can while staying in Bangalore.
Well, areas like Shivajinagar, Tannery Road, Ejipura might not be much fun. Apart from those, wandering around the outskirts of the city at night is not a great idea, but that's commonsense advice that would apply to most cities. Malls are perfectly fine for such PDAs, the Central Business District (MG Road, Brigade Road, Church Street, UB City, Residency Road) should also pose no problems at all, you find many Indian teenagers holding hands there too. Day trips from Bangalore; Nandi Hills, Srirangapatna, Yelagiri Hills, Bheemeshwari are places I would think of.


Quote:
Originally Posted by anar View Post an excursion to nandi hills would be a good idea - combine nature with history (tipu sultan's fort at the top affords amazing views of the countryside). go in the morning, back by late afternoon.

further but very interesting is a trip to mysore (mysore palace, the zoo, flower market) and srirangapatnam (the confluence of three rivers, tipu sultan monuments). this would take a whole day if you go by car. there's a new road now which cuts the time taken to reach mysore to a couple of hours at most.
Personally, I found the palace very unimpressive when I went - there are huge queues, you have to leave your footwear and camera at different places, and get very little time to actually stand and enjoy the palace when you get in. But if one is in Mysore, why not, I guess..

What new road? If you mean the NICE corridor, it hasn't reached Mysore yet. It is at present a circular road around the city that saves time if one is commuting from arterial road to arterial road. You still have to use the normal highway to get to Mysore, which should take anything from 2-4 hours depending on traffic and driving styles. Trains from Bangalore take 2-3 hours.

Hampi is an absolutely lovely place, though it can't be done as a daytrip from Bangalore.
#10 Dec 28th, 2012, 01:02
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not visiting mysore palace if in mysore would be like going to agra and not visiting the taj mahal. i went inside during the day and saw it from the outside on a sunday evening, when it gets all lit up for an hour. i found it fascinating. all the crowds added to the atmosphere.
#11 Dec 30th, 2012, 10:08
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#11

mysore palace lights

seems to be somewhat of a well-kept secret, but you can see the palace lighting every day...albeit for a few minutes.

you see, on sundays and public holidays, the palace is lit for one hour or so starting 7pm. And you can enter the palace through the entrance for free and watch it up close during those times.

on all other days, there is a sound and light show that happens from 7pm-7:30pm. the commentary is in kannada, which is the local language, and there is no relation between the narrative and the lighting mechanism. it is like being in a discotheque.

and after the show ends at 7:30pm, the palace is lit for about 15 minutes. you CANNOT enter for free, but you can see it from the outside the gates.

So, reach the palace by 7:20Pm, and you can see the lights.

hope this helps

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